GP told me “you can’t be autistic, come on” and I feel completely humiliated

I’m posting here because I really need to hear from other autistic women who might understand why this has affected me so much.
I’m 32 and I’ve been seeing the same psychologist for almost 10 years. She knows me incredibly well and has identified that I’m autistic and is very confident in that. I haven’t gone through the formal diagnostic assessment yet because of how expensive it is, and my psychologist has explained that having the formal diagnosis wouldn’t really change the treatment or support I receive from her. I am currently saving towards getting it formally done.
I’m also very high masking. I work full time and from the outside I think I probably come across as fairly capable and “normal”, but maintaining that takes an enormous amount out of me.
The last couple of weeks have been probably some of the hardest of my life. My mum has been very unwell and in hospital, there have been a lot of other things happening at the same time, and I’ve reached a point where I genuinely feel like I’ve completely run out of capacity. My psychologist has helped me understand autistic burnout before and I recognise what is happening to me now.
Unfortunately my psychologist is currently on leave, so today I called my GP because I’m struggling and needed some support.
I mentioned that I’m autistic and experiencing burnout and his immediate response was:
“You can’t be autistic, come on Tegan.”
I honestly didn’t even know what to say.
This GP doesn’t know this side of me. He sees me for short medical appointments where I walk in masking, communicate well, explain whatever physical issue I’m there for and leave. We have never had any meaningful conversations about my autism, my childhood, how I function outside of those appointments, how much effort goes into appearing okay, or what happens when I get home.
Yet he sounded so certain.
I came off the phone feeling absolutely humiliated, belittled and embarrassed. And now, despite everything I’ve worked through with a psychologist who has known me for almost a decade, part of my brain is going, What if I’m a fake? What if I’m not autistic? What if what I’m calling autistic burnout is actually just me failing to cope?
I know logically that one GP seeing the masked version of me in occasional medical appointments doesn’t know me better than my psychologist does. But emotionally his comment has really, really got to me.
I think I just need to hear from other autistic women right now.
Has anyone else had a doctor or other professional dismiss your autism because you don’t “look” autistic to them or because you mask well? Did it make you question yourself afterwards?
I feel ridiculous for being this upset by one sentence, but I can’t seem to shake it.

If there were no limitations on what you could do, how you spent your time, how you set your life up, how would you heal from autistic burnout? What do you think would be most effective and why? What practical steps would you take to set yourself up to heal and get back to a healthy version of yourself?

Everyone treats me like I am a child. They tell I am autistic right away and treat me different. I been diagnosed since preschool at age 4. In fact I am level 2 from a recent analysis. I am 30, always lived with my parents. And in a way I guess people are right, I am childish. I am immature in the sense I never understand social cues and never know what to say or how to act. I like childish things like stuffed animals, trading cards, graphic t shirts I wear everyday, I still watch kids cartoons from my childhood and watch no shows with real acting. When I must talk on the phone for example make a doctor appointment I still have my mom do it for me because I don't want to have to talk to someone on the phone. I never had a real romantic relationship, in fact I have no friends at all. I love video games and anime. Idk I just look at myself and feel like I am someone far below my age level and I feel sad.

recently i received an autism diagnosis. i have worked remotely at my job for over 6 years and was hired remote.
i submitted an accommodation letter on friday to be excused from team building events that were newly introduced this year from a new ceo. these events are 4 times a year and purely based on socializing. suddenly, come tuesday morning im
“laid off” due to restructuring organization and downsizing the team.
when i asked when this was decided they said 4 months ago and couldnt tell me if anyone else was included or not, but that it wasnt based on performance.
do i have a case for disability discrimination? can they prove this was decided 4 months ago?
all i said was interesting timing she’s like yeah it’s not about your accommodation request.
this is based out of california.

My sister and I both have autism. I quit teaching after 12 years because I was so burned out I couldn't do it anymore, and I got no support from parents. Although I have been looking for work, my parents look at me as lazy, or "you just don't wanna work." They have no idea what it's been doing to my health and think "teaching is one of the easiest jobs out there." Meanwhile my older sister quit working all together about 13 years ago. She lives with them, they buy her everything, even a new car. That's just fine with them, if you bring it up they say, "She's sick, she can't work." I don't get it. It's not a jealousy thing, I just wish they could have SOME sympathy for me when I'm struggling. Maybe it's an outdated gender thing, especially with my dad, that men are supposed to be strong and show no signs of weakness and women are supposed to be fragile and cared for, but that doesn't explain my mom.

31, autistic

So this requires a bit of a story. My only friend I’ve had for the past 8 years, our friendship ended officially last night. I say officially because he hasn’t felt like a friend in months. He has things hard, slightly harder than I do. So I did what I could to make his life easier. I’d get him things, pay for his various subscriptions, I even gave him a monthly allowance. I also paid for his dog’s cremation and aftercare.

He was always kind of a dick, but a week ago my cat fell very ill. I personally cannot have children so my cat is my little girl. Anyway I brought her to the emergency vet, where she had an extremely high fever and was diagnosed with diabetes. I was given three options. Death, humane death, or expensive treatment. So I chose treatment. Then I was stuck with a near $4k bill. I’ve never dealt with anything like this before. So I was worried. I thought I was able to tell him about how worried I was. He called me “disgusting” and “retarded” for being afraid.

I had the last straw with him last night after he said he wants to change to compromise with me. He even asked me what he could do. I said let’s start easy with step one, be respectful. But within 20 minutes he couldn’t manage that. I couldn’t open up to him, he has this tendency to make things so much worse. So I’ve been keeping my emotions bottled up for years.

Now here’s my issue. He separated me from friends I had before him. Now I have nobody. I’ve spent so long away from the world that I realize it’s changed so much. I’m not sure if I can find a place in it. I’m scared, I’m lonely, and I just don’t know where to go now. I had to move back in with my mom because of debt. I’m working with a social worker to try and improve my life, but I have strong doubts it’ll amount to anything. My depression has become so severe my meds don’t even help me get out of bed in the morning. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I’m just at a complete loss.

For context both of my sisters and partner have ADHD and on separate occasions I have brought up to each one that ADHD seems rough to have and they each told "yea but it is nothing compared to autism".

I just looked at them and told them I'm not miserable I'm happy being autistic and they were confused by that.

I know sometimes on here people get frustrated with being autistic but I really do enjoy my autism; to naturally not understand the norms and be 100% myself is truly freeing when I see how much other people have to fit in.

I don't know what is a downside of autism is to be honest at least where I would be miserable.

My entire life (19f) I have dealt with severe hoarding issues.

I have stickers and erasers and random junk from all the way since kindergarten that I can’t seem to throw away. When making purchases I often buy 2 or more of the same thing to keep some safe while only one is for actual use. I have an extensive sticker collection that I can’t bring myself to use in hopes of one day finding the “perfect” place to stick them. I buy multiples of the same clothes in the same color and style. Every stuffed animal I own has a double. I collect and save packaging for the set of items I do end up using as well.

I think I’m sort of justifying it because my space is not a mess. In fact my space is very organized and clean and I know where everything is. But it’s starting to be sort of a compulsion I’ve noticed. Whenever the opportunity for a gift or a treat for myself comes up I only want another of something I already own multiple of. I don’t know why but having multiple of the same things brings me a sense of comfort.

My working theory is that this issue stems from my dislike of change. I don’t like new things or experiences so when I find something I like I don’t feel a need to explore other options I just need more of the same item forever.

My space is becoming quite full of just assorted “collections”. I’m wondering if anyone else has this issue and if they know anything that could possibly help. Or just a shared experience. Thank you for reading.

any clue?

I am autistic, masked my entire life till COVID hit, then I struggled to mask, which made me struggle with employment.
I'm so tired of sneaky HR questions, making you think they're just chatting but it's really all a test and to ask sneaky illegal questions to see if you're disabled. Employment is already hard enough, these sneaky questions always catch me off guard because I always think they're just chatting.

So... great. What the fuck do I do?

I'm somehow young enough to where people look at me pityingly, telling me that I'm still young enough to turn my life around. I hate that. I hate that optimism because I've tried. I've steamrolled through life with blind optimism, and it *didn't work*. I just made a fool of myself.

But I've done my research. I've met disabled older people, and how beaten down they are. I see how invisible they are and how everyone has given up on them. I will still be disabled and I will be old.

It's like I'm seeing my life play out before my eyes, and I feel helpless to stop it. I don't want to live long enough to see that fate for myself. I don't want to experience people slowly losing faith in me and distancing themselves from me. Everything I built disintegrating before my eyes. The meager support system I have just...vanishing.

I just dont know what I'm supposed to do. I was good at studies. I was working that part-time job. I was managing, but my body and brain just gave out on me. It didn't matter how hard I worked. I stopped thinking, I stopped speaking, remembering to clean myself, not listening, not being able to do customer service, online forms and systems were confusing and overwhelming to me....etc...and I couldn't perform to their expectations anymore. I worked really hard. I tried so hard. But it doesn't matter, does it? Masking is unsustainable. Working is unsustainable. Getting a degree is unsustainable. Saving for a house, for retirement is unsustainable.

I feel like a lolcow, like Chris chan. I feel like a basement dweller because now, I live like one. I feel the full breadth of pity and discomfort from others when I'm literally just existing out in public with my mom. When I'm literally opening my mouth to respond to the bits of conversation directed at me.

Nothing makes sense anymore. Everything triggers my cognitive dissonance.

And this shame...it keeps building as the expectations keep increasing. I don't know what to do. Even speaking to a therapist seems...pointless. They can't live my life for me. And the older I get, the less sympathy I get.

I didn't get help young. Apparently, it's too late for me all due to circumstances out of my control.

The grief over my past, the shame over my present, the dread over my future.

I just wish someone would tell me what to do....I wish someone would *look at me* and help me, not out of obligation, but just because they just want to. Not because they see me as just another destitute soul in the system, but because they see me as a human being... a person... who *was* that bright child with potential. Who *was* that child that could have been helped. And who is a person who needs to be helped *now*.

I haven't felt a genuine sense of connection in so long.

I keep latching on to the sprinkles of hope older adults keep dishing out, only to be shut out of it when I can't perform to expectations.

It feels like there are no real solutions. Just window dressing.

Full time office worker in UK

I’m speaking with my employer to change my working pattern to accommodate my ASD as I’m really struggling with burnout.

I’ve requested an extra day WFH (3 office 2 home split) but the idea of working 4 days a week has also been suggested. 4 days would either be 4 in office or 3 from office 1 from home.

Anyone had similar experiences? Which would you recommend?

My roommate and close friend is moving- I’m happy for her - this is a positive change- but it’s too much change. My new roommate who is moving in is also my friend, but I also have cptsd and they have accidentally triggered it by yelling at me and throwing objects and I just don’t think they are going to stop triggering me or really make an effort to.

I don’t want to feel confined to my room to be safe like I did my whole childhood

My roommate is also taking her cat, who likes to cuddle me and comfort me when I’m sad so I’m losing that method of self regulation as well

I have so many responsibilities right now, from helping her move out, to family, to work, to my medical issues- it’s just too much and I can feel myself breaking down

I kept having these like “mini meltdowns” I was able to calm down from but yesterday I just couldn’t stop myself from scratching and biting and hitting myself, I also have a burn on my hand which was self inflicted but worse than intended. I think I need help, I’m sorry
Idk what to do

Hey all. I completed an assessment with Prosper Health in January 2026, and I received a diagnosis of "F84.0 Autism Spectrum Disorder, without intellectual/developmental delay or significant language impairment, requiring support at level 2." I can certify that the information in this post is accurate as of January 2026. If things have changed since then, I won't know anything about that.

I notice that if you look for info about Prosper Health's autism assessments on reddit, you mostly find posts by people with questions or concerns, and any helpful information tends to be in the comments. So I thought it would be good to put together a post that is actually informative and hopefully clears up some things for people who are anxiously navigating the diagnostic process. I know there can be a sense that it may be shady because it feels too easy or too good to be true, so I just want to offer what insight I can based on my experience. I hope this doesn't come across as an ad. I had a good experience but I am not affiliated with them in any way.

The first thing to know: there is a good chance your health insurance covers a Prosper assessment. I feel like this is important to mention off the jump because I know a lot of people avoid assessments for financial reasons. If you have health insurance, you might not have to pay much for an assessment through Prosper. It will depend on your state and your insurance, but companies like United, Cigna, Aetna, and BCBS do cover Prosper assessments. I don't have a ton of details on the price ranges there because I am uninsured. What I can tell you is that as an uninsured patient, I self-paid $950 for my assessment in January 2026.

Some things that Prosper doesn't do

• They do not do a full neuropsych battery.
• They do not do in-person assessments.
• They do not use the ADOS. Some places will only accept diagnoses that use the ADOS as it is traditionally held as the "gold standard."
• They do not assess you for other conditions or provide differential diagnoses. If you are considering Prosper because you want to know what you have, don't go through them. Only go through them if you want to know if you are autistic. Their autism assessments are strictly assessing for autism. Please note here that it is possible you will receive an inconclusive diagnosis if your assessor isn't comfortable parsing your symptoms. If you feel that your situation is complicated, you are taking a risk going through Prosper. However, what I will say is that I came into my assessment with pre-existing diagnoses of ADHD, Bipolar I, and panic disorder, and my assessor did not hesitate at all to diagnose autism.

How the process works at Prosper

• Really important: Prosper itself is not a healthcare provider. They will link you to providers who are licensed to diagnose autism in your state. You will be able to choose your assessor, and this is probably the most important thing here. A good assessor will likely yield a good experience. A bad assessor will likely yield a bad experience. You can look at each person's profile on Prosper and try to feel out if they will be a fit for you or if you're comfortable with their qualifications. The assessor you choose will also determine your timeline, as some will have more availability than others. I don't know that I am comfortable publicly naming my assessor, but I will tell you who assessed me if you reach out privately.
• Before your assessment, you will fill out a questionnaire. I think they officially say that this will take about 30 min, but it took me a couple of hours. I would recommend here that you respond in as much detail as you like. I didn't want to leave any room for ambiguity when I felt I could avoid it.
• Before your assessment, you will also need people who have spent time with you to fill out two questionnaires, one from someone who knew you in early childhood (I believe age 0-6) and one from someone who knows or has known you in adulthood. You want these to be people who know you as well as possible because their feedback does matter. Importantly, both questionnaires can be completed by the same person. My mom did both of mine.
• The assessment itself consists of three video calls. The first two video calls are 90 minutes each and they constitute the actual assessment. These should happen within a couple of days of each other. The third takes place about a week later and is, I believe, 45 minutes and is a feedback session in which your assessor will walk you through the results of your assessment and how they felt you fit each diagnostic criterion.
• Effectively, the assessment is a series of questions about each section of the DSM-5 diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum disorder. It will help a lot if you have looked into the diagnostic criteria ahead of time and can discuss how you feel like each one fits or doesn't fit you. Important note here: when possible, bring examples from childhood. Presence of symptoms in early childhood is a mandatory diagnostic criterion. If you can't establish that with concrete examples, it's possible you could get an inconclusive diagnosis.
• You will receive your diagnostic report in full. Mine consists of 14 pages summarizing the assessment and an additional 7 pages of recommendations, including recommended workplace accommodations.
• You will continue to have access to your assessor through a chat on your online portal after your assessment has concluded. I talked to my assessor as recently as two weeks ago, 7 months after I completed the assesssment.
• For me, the whole process from sign up to completion took about 3 weeks.

What was my assessor like?

She was extremely warm and encouraging. Not intimidating in the least. She was knowledgeable and up to date, and she understood everything I explained to her, and she was also prepared to understand how my comorbid ADHD diagnosis disguises or contradicts certain autistic traits. I had absolutely no doubt that she was thorough, qualified, honest, and invested. She also could tell I was nervous and she told me at the end of the first session that she was leaning toward diagnosing autism at about 80% but still needed to know more, and she told me at the end of the second session that she was going to diagnose autism and we'd walk through it in full in the feedback session.

What have I gotten out of it? Would I do it again?

• The biggest thing for me is honestly just not having to go through the whole, "I'm autistic, but I haven't been formally diagnosed, but I'm positive I'm autistic, really, I promise" song and dance with everyone who I want to take me seriously. I just... am autistic. There's no pushback. Any doctor I talk to, I can just say, "I'm autistic." Anyone who I'm worried I will put off if I am not masking... "I'm autistic, so if I don't make eye contact or if I come off kind of weird, that's why."
• I got a full diagnostic report to show my dad. I always thought that maybe if my dad properly understood me, it would smooth over a lot of the friction that has been present in our relationship, but I didn't feel like I had convincing authority to defend myself. Having the official diagnosis from a qualified professional made me feel a lot more at ease. My dad texts me autistic memes and tweets now! It's very cute.
• A level 2 diagnosis has really helped make it clear to people that I need a lot of help and my struggles are genuinely debilitating.
• I have a list of workplace accommodations I can show to employers if I want to.
• My assessor wrote me an emotional support animal letter, so I don't have to pay a pet deposit or pet rent for my cat.
• I would absolutely do it again. Worth every penny and then some for me

Is Prosper a diagnosis mill?

I truly do not believe so, but I can't say that with authority since I was of course diagnosed. What I will say here is that you can find plenty of examples just here on reddit of people who did not receive a diagnosis from their Prosper assessments. Prosper doesn't publish statistics about what percent of people get diagnoses from their Prosper assessments, but it is worth noting that any service like this aimed at undiagnosed adults will have a fairly high diagnosis rate because their patients are invariably people who have put a lot of time and energy into researching autism and self-assessing, and most of those people are autistic! But yeah, for me, nothing ever felt sketchy. I have continued to have totally open access to my assessor. She never once pushed their therapy on me. When I told her a service in my state required an ADOS assessment, she was prepared to look into doing a pro bono ADOS assessment or reaching out to colleagues in my state who could do it. Ultimately, the same service that required the ADOS assessment provides them for free, so that became a non issue. I also don't think that diagnosis mills are really in the business of level 2 diagnoses.

I am happy to do my best to answer any further questions y'all have, but I do think this is about all the information I know lol. Hope this is helpful to people looking through their assessment options.

I’m not going to make this long but I’m a 24M. I don’t “look” stereotypically autistic.. most would not believe it because I’m a conventionally attractive white gay man who probably has noticeable “quirks” but they cant seem to fully know what it is (aware of my privilege) but knowing I’ve been masking this hard hurts me, it wasn’t just trauma or extreme social anxiety all along and reading two books I strongly connect with truly hurts me. Especially realizing that most of the “personas” or mask I put up aren’t really me, it makes me not want to talk to people I know because it’s like nobody really truly gets me internally. And Ive decided I’m no longer going to try have people believe I’m autistic because this is just hurting my soul. I’m autistic and if they believe me cool and if not I don’t care. Any advice on dwelling but not staying there? Ways to cope? How to unmask around the people I’ve known for years? My psychologist who is listed with an outdated term to many a “high functioning” adult autism psychologist is amazing and reassures me everytime that after today you’re still YOU and this is just an explanation. My question is am I still really “ME”??? I’m having a hard time with this. There’s are amazing people on this app, so I thought I’d appreciate getting advice from a few.

Have you ever looked at every person around you thinking they all have at least one safe person to that they can look up to? everyone seems to have at least one friend or one family member or whoever that they can be themselves with, truly themselves or at least a good percentage of their true self (not sure how I would define that but yeah).
Well, I have never had that, like ever. Maybe the closest to that would be my mom and sisters but that’s pretty much it and it’s very partial.

I always longed to meet someone with whom I could truly be my most authentic self but since I have been unmasking since my childhood due to extreme abuse, it’s very hard, nearly impossible.
So, the loneliness and hatred for others have been growing forever since I was young. I would never say it to others that I hate them but truly, if all the people I know were to disappear tomorrow, I wouldn’t care at all. If you’ve read the book No longer Human by Dazai, well it’s what i relate to the most.
I truly have never genuinely and authentically cared for someone during my 22 years of existence, although i’ve been unconsciously longing for it.

That’s until I met, 2 months ago, a certain guy. This certain guy has, for the first time of my existence made me change this belief that, if everyone were to disappear, I would not feel anything. We had a situationship for almost 2 months and he recently told me he was not into me anymore after spending the most beautiful and intense 2 months of my life. I am therefore going through my first heartbreak ever at this moment.
I am not quite sure how a heartbreak is supposed to feel like but the way I feel right now is unexplainable.
I had met many guys and always got into situationships but never really got attached on this level. I got attached though, but nothing compared with this certain guy.

To be honest, meeting him was like if I was born again. No actually, like if I was born for the first time, as if I had never lived before. For the first time in my entire life, I felt alive. I felt understood, heard, cared about, and for the first time, I didn’t feel ashamed of living, ashamed to talk, to listen, to walk in the streets, to say anything. He was the most beautiful soul I had ever met, he made me better in every way, I started being more myself with other people, reading more, educating myself more, treating others better, judging people less etc… he made me understand the parts of myself that i hated and made me feel ok with these parts.

He looked at me in a way that made me feel like I mattered. I could look at him in the eyes and say ‘I can’t feel attached to any human being and never will and I don’t believe in the concept of relationships cause humans are selfish’ and he would laugh and agree and we would spend nights and nights and nights outside on the same bench stargazing and discussing such topics both agreeing we would never find our soulmate on this earth and that love was useless and an illusion.

He never ever talked about himself first in a conversation, he never forgot to ask me every night if i felt safe enough to sleep tonight cause he knew i had insomnia, he remembered things about me i can’t even remember myself.

I have many friends, many people you can consider I can thrive around socially. Yet, I’m not attached to them, I can’t understand how they can get attached to me, they think they know me but they don’t cause I’m always masking, therefore they don’t know the real me.
Him. He knew the real me. For the first time of my existence, I tangibly, literally, got conscious of unmasking. Of showing who I am. And we shared similarities in every possible way of thinking.
He said we practically dating, we planned vacation together, he met my whole family, knows everything about me, but randomly ghosted me and finally said he was not into me anymore.

From the beginning, I knew it was dangerous to get attached because of religion differences and future long distance between us that would get established but the feeling of existing was so addictive.

The first weeks, I was so avoidant and someone getting interested in me ? it felt disgusting and oddly unusual that something felt wrong, it felt as I was watching myself from someone else’s point of view looking at myself and mocking me like “why do you act nice with him, why are you excited to see him, why do you want to kiss him…” but i got over this and wanted to change, for him and for good.

Now, I want to throw up every second, I haven’t eaten a proper meal for weeks, my life has no purpose, I just want to sleep to forget. I’m experiencing the biggest meltdown ever. Everything I see makes me think about him and of how happy i was, going from 100 to 0. It was the first time I ever dared to trust someone in my life, the first time I ever felt safe and understood the word “safe”. I think I can move on in a few weeks but not only i am grieving this situationship and the asshole he is but maybe also the person I was for the first time with him, the feelings i could feel for the first time and maybe the love that i could get a taste of.

Anyway, yes there was lovebombing for sure, yes he had many redflags, yes I might have been only a challenge to him and yes he disappeared after me wanting to fully commit but that is truly not the question honestly …

My question to the one who is reading this:
Please, how can I move on from this, I feel like dying but in a way it’s insane, I feel dead, truly. I want to feel alive again.

Lately I've been traveling more cause I started seeing someone, he lives quite a bit away and I don't have a driver's license so I've been traveling by train and bus. Before, I was terrified of public transportation, I was confused and scared taking the bus in another town cause I was unfamiliar. Unfamiliar = scary.

I would freak out if the bus took another route, I'd be horrified I stepped on the wrong bus—but now I'm chill. If I'm really uncertain, I'll ask. People are usually very nice and helpful. I think my fear for taking the bus comes from a driver refusing to let me off for 2 stops :'))

So I've been taking the train. I've been taking the bus. Sometimes both, and it has been going fine. I'm so happy to go someplace else, and to travel comfortably. It's refreshing trying something new and realizing "oh I was being silly avoiding this for so long lol." I'm on the bus writing this and I can't wait to step off and stretch my back.

Hey y'all,

I have a pretty specific question about dating struggles as an autistic guy. Ive had about two dozen first dates over the course of the last two years and get the same response from girls almost all the time. They tell me that they are not feeling anything because I am so monotone and not animated and that comes off as cold and distant.

I try to circumvent this by being warm and interested verbally (I am very curious), but it's not the same. My therapist says so, too. Communicating this verbally is not the same as "feeling" it.

Ive tried to be way more upfront about this and say that I am bad at subtle cues and reading people and would rather just speak about things, but whenever I am this direct I basically get zero dates or receive very bad feedback.

What do I do? Just keep going? I am honestly very depressed about this.

The doctor’s reasoning that I most likely don’t have ASD is because I’m fine when meeting people for the first time, but not as a relationship develops. That doesn’t seem right to me.

Therefore she thinks it’s an anxiety issue.

I THINK my masking might have played a part of it, as I scored 145 on the CAT-Q.

Anyways, I don’t wanna say anything, but I might have seen a quack. lol.

does anyone else feel like this? or have felt like this and changed it somehow?
growing up i think i was always really open about my interests and i was always unapologetically myself around family, and i think when i reached an age where i kind of gained self awareness i completely stopped. i literally just keep my numerous interests to myself because i have a fear of feeling embarrassed for some reason and i just express myself to my friends/online friends instead. it’s a good outlet but i would really love to be more open with my family, especially at times where they want me to list things i want for birthdays, christmas etc. i usually just ask for basic essentials (which is fine) rather than asking for things that would genuinely bring me joy. i’m a huge nerd and they do know that they’re just not fully aware of the things i really love. i think maybe it’s due to the fact i was bullied growing up and i was always made fun of for the way i acted?? i would love to know if anyone else experiences this and if anyone managed to ‘get over’ it

I’m already in my late twenties. For years, I’ve wondered whether I might be autistic, but I never had access to an official assessment or therapy in my country. Because of that, I never wanted to self-diagnose, so I mostly pushed the thought aside.
Recently, though, I heard it from a specialist, that I am, without a doubt, autistic.
I don’t really know what to do now. Where do I even start?
I always imagined that getting an answer would bring relief, that I’d finally think, “Everything makes sense now.” But that isn’t what happened. Instead, I just feel lost. It’s like, okay… now what?
How do I cope? How do I begin to unmask after spending so many years forcing myself to adopt behaviors that never came naturally, like reminding myself when to smile or how much eye contact to make? How do I figure out which parts of me are actually me, and which parts are just masking?
I’m exhausted from trying so hard to fit into a world that often doesn’t feel built for me.
Unfortunately, I still don’t really have access to autism-informed therapy or support, so for now I have to figure out a lot of this on my own. That’s why I’m looking for resources that are actually helpful.
Has anyone else gone through this? Are there any books, articles, websites, creators, or other resources that genuinely helped you after receiving a diagnosis in adulthood? I’m looking for something that can help me understand myself better, be less harsh on myself, and learn how to stop constantly shrinking myself just to fit in. I don’t just want to understand the diagnosis, I want to learn how to use it to build a life that feels more authentic, sustainable, and compassionate toward myself.

My most recent ex made me feel like shit for being autistic. He made me feel bad for not making constant eye contact, fidgeting, needing headphones, being sensitive, and not always understanding sarcasm or jokes. Now I feel like nobody will want to be with me because of it. He also used to take advantage of my autism by being disrespectful then gaslighting me, saying I didn’t understand he was joking when it clearly was disrespect. I’m afraid of that happening again.

Hiya. I have not slept sufficiently, naturally, for around 34 years. God knows I’ve tried, but only prescribed medication sorts me out. I cannot stress how crucial it is- I remember a dr decades ago saying “your body will get what it needs naturally”. No, it does not, or at least not enough to ensure I stay awake throughout a working day.

Currently I’m on mirtazapine/remeron but I am not sleeping properly again and my life is falling apart. What helps other people? I am seeing the dr soon and need to have a discussion about what to do.