I've experienced phases of Waswas before. This phase has honestly been the worst one of my life and I keep missing prayers because of it.

It always begins with Ghusl. Rinsing my nose, ears, mouth, anus, perinium, urethra, balls. I rinse but it feels like I havent. Even if water has logically touched these spots, I can't stop washing again.

Then it's wudu. It feels like I forget every step I do. I wash my face once, then then twice, then it feels like I havent washed at all the alleged third time. Or water never made it onto my hands.

Then its prayer. Three or four rakaats? Did I miss a verse? Did I miss a letter? I find myself at the final verse and have forgotten everything. I find myself hyperfocusing too much on a tiny mistake. A tiny unnecesary movement, an unnecessaey sound escaping my mouth. I have a list of prayers I need to qadha.

Then it's my niyyah. They say to recite niyyah as you rub the water onto your face. As you peform the takbiratul ihram. Failure to do so invalidates EVERYTHING.

https://zulkiflialbakri.com/artikel/niat-wuduk-sebelum-air-sampai-ke-muka https://muftiwp.gov.my/ms/artikel/al-kafi-li-al-fatawi/5837-al-kafi-1974-kedudukan-niat-ketika-takbiratul-ihram

I repeat the beginning over and over and OVER again and I only move on when I grow tired. Never because I trust myself.

Then it's purity. I open my urethra up to wash my pee. I soap my anus multiple times until it feels right. I stay in the toilet longer than I should be as if I were showering. Then I wonder if my body has splashes of toilet water. Do my clothes have traces of pee? I sniff and sniff and sniff and sniff and sniff. I constantly put my clothes and undergarments into the wash. Then, it's najis. I look down everytime I walk to make sure I don't step in poop. I look back and retrace my steps to make sure I didn't step in poop. I check my shoes. If I hit a wall, I feel unclean. If I step in sand on the road, I feel unclean. If I walk by a non-halal restaurant, I feel unclean.

Dog poop and pee could be everywhere. Pork smoke could be everywhere. Cat poop, dog poop, i dont care. It makes me want to peform the ritual cleaning for Najis Mughalazzah. All because I walked through steam from a non-halal grill. A non-halal restaurant. Stepping in unknown poop. Touching the dry shirt of a friend that was ripped cuz of his dog. Eating the food from a non-muslim friend. I did the ritual already. I rinsed my mouth with dirt, so did my lips, face, neck, torso. I rub the coarse dirt onto my body.

And now, I've been missing prayers. I hate it. I find it difficult. I never find peace doing it. I have so many I need to qadha. Some out of doubt. Some out of necessity.

I'm so SO exhausted. But I dont think I deserve redemption. I've sinned so much. I'm not like the other people who can do good.

And now I dont know if I can trust my memory or not. I want to trust that I did Ghusl last Thursday AND last friday. The memory feels clear, but what if it isnt? What if, what if, what if.

Help?

I dont even know anymore

I'm doomed

And no amount of advice and Quranic verses can help.

Maybe this was my destiny?

Recently, I’ve been trying to sincerely repent and return to Allah, but instead of feeling relieved, I’ve been experiencing a lot of anxiety and feeling overwhelmed. I constantly worry, “What if Allah doesn’t accept my repentance?” I’ve also tried therapy, but I don’t feel like it’s helping, and I’m still struggling with these anxious thoughts and feelings.

Hey guys so around a year ago, I did smth really bad that I regret for everyday.

A cousin of mine (which I'll name A, a female) was in an online relationship with a guy, it was very zina type that they used to send photos to each other ifykyk.

I got a hold of a ss of them sending each other photos, and at that time, (a) was blackmailing my other F cousin (b) since she was also in the same scenario.

My cousin b would discuss with me that she's scared and all. And on the other hand my sister was also being blackmailed with madeup relationships which she didn't had, and she was also being shipped to male cousins who privately admitted that they liked my sister. (Ik messed up family, didn't have any contact with them until last 3 years)

So idk why but I told (b) that I have some evidence that she can show (a) mother, so she'd stop destroying the two girls. (B) swore on Allah that she'd only tell the girls mother and never ever include my name that I gave her. From my side I didn't think about it and gave her the photo discreetly.

Later that year, (b) snitched idk why and said I had the photos, while i didn't then cuz I deleted them already. I was in distress and swore that I never saw the photos and never shared them with her, by which my aunt said really mean stuff and broke contact with us. My mom was hurt and asked me alot, yet I refused to know anything abt it.

The photo spread cuz (b) shared to her bf, whom I also helped her get away from cuz she said she wants to be more religious. Now ik if I never shared the photos, this all would've never happened. Some guys in family said they already saw the photos 3 years ago, and shifted the blame.

Now I'm about to move near my family (aunts) again and ik they'll question me, but I already lied alot and even lied on swear, but I know I did that cuz (b) betrayed me by sharing my name and that I sent her. I sent her so she could talk to (a)'s mother rather she spread it across the family.

Now that I really fear the aakhira and am on religious path, this haunts me alot, how my aunt who said she'll question on aakhira will prove herself infront of my mother who believed I never did it. I don't want to admit it. I'm just scared everyday.

Today I had my parents teacher meeting. I got marks above average . I was gonna be in average class. I made a dua begging allah for 3 days to put me in b class infact I was in b class. But they changed my class due to not answering questions on spot. But instead my they grilled me my parents grilled. I think suicide is best option. Or leave the house at night and live on streets . I ain't even kidding my parents don't even care Abt me. They don't give a shit.

This is a problem that is purely psychological, and I don't let it make me ungrateful to Allah. Allah is rejecting my duas, but I obey Him and thank Him regardless of whether He fulfils my requests or not

Bad thoughts still linger on my mind and burden my heart. Like if I can't get a job at fast food 6 times in a row after being trained, and the issue is not me being lazy or irresponsible, am I even meant to achieve anything in life? I work hard and show maximum discipline, but people do not accept me and do not like me. I don't know what should I fix about myself so people begin to like me. Please make dua to make the hearts of other people accept me the way I am as long as I do not do anything wrong

This is making me feel like a failure. Can you give me an advice to handle this situation?

I always think my faith would be better..if I make firm decisions. It will workout. Nothing is working out I can't help my but compare myself. I can't even get one thing in my life. I do believe Allah will hear me, but I can't handle multiple tests at same time. I'm doing istighfar everyday. I'm praying, pleading. Why can't I get a miracle in my life

Please pray for me make duas for help to pay off my debts as fast as possible.

I am 45k in debt from gambling. I have promised to Allah during my prayers that I am no longer gambling and never will again. I just asked for help and support to recover all my debts and that gambling will no longer be part of my life.

I truly regret what I’ve done and honestly it is something I will never do in my life again and will always tell people that it’s evil. Like even by miracle if I was to wake up with my debts covered and someone money in my account, not one cent would go in gambling. It is haram for a reason, it is straight up evil.

Thank you

Assalamu Alaikum all, I ve done biggest Sin of my lyf I ve Disobeyed, Spoke Loud, Misbehaved with my Parents, i Love my Parents, n i m their only Child, i don't know how cud it happen by me but it has happened, i have blamed my parents for calling me my Hometown for 10 Consecutive yrs I don't know how I m going to Face Almighty Allah.

My dad worked in Gulf Countries from his early 20s he was the 1st in my Family to go Abroad/Gulf for work n ltr he helped his brother n cousins to go Gulf as there was good pay n opportunities, n he had thought the same for me as well after completing my studies after i grow up he wanted me to go Gulf as well

In 2009 I was 15 in 10th n into Cricket in India which led me go to Bangalore for Pursuing my studies n Cricket as well n I was into Sports Scholarship my parents had supported n let me go to Bangalore which is 600kms from my Hometown everything was fine he was gng back to Qatar after his 2-3 months of vacation n I was in Bangalore I came home 1st n 2nd time he was Healthy n fine but when 3rd tym home from Bangalore I was shocked to see him.

My dad's Health got Deteriorated he was Muscular well build, Healthy n all of sudden he got Lean he lost all the Muscles, and at the same time he got Eye Issue as well he was not able to see properly, both things happened same time, I didn't feel gng back within 6 months this happened, i said I'll complete my studies n come back to home but they ( my parents) insisted me to Study in Bangalore only, i wud feel very bad that i m unable to do anything for them n wud be in Grieve.

My dad didn't go to Gulf bcz his Health got affected n he started a Hotel Business in Hometown i completed my 10th I asked them not work but my Dad wud nt listen n continued to Work n my parents said me to continue my further Studies in Bangalore I was not interested to study there when my parents are in tough times n our life got completely changed I wanted to be with them, i wanted to make them sit at home relax but they asked me to Study I studied their n I wud always be in Sorrow that all this has happened with Us i said I'll study til +2/12th then I'll stop Studying n il work n u have to leave the business n be at Home they just said ok, another 2 yrs passed they again insisted me to do Degree of 3 years, I was like again my parents have to suffer for 3 more years. I never wanted them to work but they just said me to continue studying there.

Whenevr i wud come to my Hometown n while leaving home to Bangalore I wud carry the Pain, Fear that i m there only child n Staying 600kms from them n they need the most, n they will be alone again at home with my Grandmother, I have always had this Fear in me how they r managing all the things, I wud always feel like leaving Studies n work n let them sit but that didn't happen, then i started to Work along with my Studies Night Shift for US based Company, I wud always ask my Dad to leave bcz I wud be in Constant Fear n Worried calling them 3-4 tyms a day n it kept on for 6 years then 1 fine day they called me home.

The actual part where i Ruined my Aakhirat :- my parents called me to join their Business at my Hometown I was ok but the Business was bcz of a Urea Fertilizer Manufacturing Plant n that Co got shut down n our Business got affected n my Dad asked me to go to Gulf country through his Reference in his previous Company, I was like 600 kms I have lived with Fear, FOMO, Worried thinking abt u, how I m going to be Ok if I leave u both n go 2000kms away for 2 years ill be in Trauma again, I didn't listen n didn't go n kept doing jobs in my Hometown

He didn't stop working still it was 5 years past that I being with them, he wud always ask me to get married but I didn't I wud say i ve stil not settled here I'll not marry n he didn't sit at Home so that I wud get relief that he is at Home n not working n i cud go to Bangalore or Gulf but he wud always say me "Don't worry too much abt me nothing will happen" I was like how cud I not ur Health n Eyes r being affected how cud I not worry abt u, he wud stil say if u dnt go to Gulf u won't have a good future n he wud ask me to go for just 2-4 years n come back n marry here, I didn't listen neither he listen left his Business, until Covid -19 in 2020 lockdown he finally left I was reliefed I did WFH for 2 years n he asked me again to go Gulf i didn't go I was living with Fear in my heart all the time, if I go how will they be n as here at my hometown there where not much opportunities I was not making money what I was supposed to do, my relatives taunting me that I m dng Marketing n Sales jobs n not making anything out of it. My all Cousins r Engineers, Doctor, Government Employees n r Earning osm n in Gulf Countries some at my Hometown.

Last year he passed away 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

TL : DR :- I have disobeyed, Misbehaved, Raised my Voice against my Hard working Parents bcz my dad wudnt listen to me to leave his Business n stay at home so that they be Comfortable at Home n i wud go any where n Work Freely, My Parents didn't had any Fault they did their duties Perfectly I m very much Grateful to them.

My biggest mistake was i didn't go anywhere to Earn good amount of Money n Marry while he was there before the age of 25-26, stayed back at home with no opportunities, bcz I was at a Constant Fear after my Dad's Health got affected with his Eyes, n well Build Body n this is not a reason of me not doing anything I was working but Earning less n wanted to stay with them

I ve cooked/ruined my Aakhirat guys

I m not able to leave my Native Hometown n work in other City, still Constantly living with the Fear.

I m not into any kinda Haram Relationship,

but what I did is a Huge n biggest Sin that I committed, torturing my Parents, to whom I love so much

Allah has made this Dunya a Test but I became a Test for my Parents 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Ik my sin unforgivable

"Rabbir hamhuma kama rabbayani sagheera"

I pray n wish Allah be pleased with my Dad have Mercy on him.

Sorry guys it too long to read. Do pray for me n my parents

urgent dua request

Salaam,

I just wanted to humbly put a dua request out there guys, I did my resit attempt exam today and it didnt go as well as I hoped I am in constant worry and upset over it, I have prayed tahajjud for it and consistently made duas for this career for the past 6 years of my life. Life has taken its toll and I am currently 2 years in this degree however I have been studying for this for the past 4 years due to resit attempts. This is my last chance ever and Allah has consistently given me hope and allowed me to pass my other resit attempt. Please pray that ny exam results allow me to pass through into the next year and that I am able to oursue this career I have worked extremely hard to maintain. Please do dua Allah makes this degree and career easy for me Inshallah

Thankyou and alhamdullilah for everything Allah has give me

Any advice would be great

Assalamualaikum! I've been unemployed for 8 months and has been applying for jobs. I am feeling slightly demotivated and have been praying for Allah to ease my affairs.

If you're reading this, please doa for me to secure a full time job soon.

May Allah ease your affairs too.
Thank you, kind strangers <3

​

Esselamu Aleykum wa Rahmetullahi wa berakathu.

So, long long story but I'l try to make it short. My highest level of Imaan and my most motivated times were when I was 14/15, so not a long time ago (can't tell my age or gender) . Even then and before I had issues. I think that I have adhd for a very long time (going to a psychatrist to check these times)

Even though I really, vallahi I try so hard for my mental health but in the last months or even years I love الله logically. I believe in him and do all of those things logically. It has been so hard for me to feel the prayer the Qur'an emotinally as I used to. The day before yesterday I felt again and I thaught: finally, I am feeling again. But today, everything is back to usual. The reason I felt was because I found out why الله Subhanahu wa ta'ala has even created us in the first place when there are people going to hellfire. I know, he knows everything but this was also something that I believed in logically but my heart didn't feel like that. Even though I KNEW. I really want my heart agree to my mind. So I feel like I does not love me even though I know he does. But I iust don't feel like it. Prayer has also been very hard but I don't miss them and I try not to miss the sunnah's too. I am not doing too much. Just wearing the hijab, praying and stuff. Doing the fardh. I also don't do big haram (kaba'ir) But the time when I was 15, I was fasting on Mondays and Thursdays, |ess caring about what people said and I prayed tahajjud, duha and evvabin almost each day. Another thing that I did was I stopped watching Netflix or Entertaining stuff if that didn't bring knowledge. Like dawah videos, or videos about psychology etc. .l was so motivated but what changed...? I really really really really really really really really want that back. I don't feel like makina dua too. All the things that I am doing feel forced. I know this all maybe even gets me more good deeds than before cause I am forcing myself but life has been so hard cause of this that I wanted to pray for my life to come to an end but I also don't wanna do that cause it feels haram and I remember it is haram. A lot of stuff that I didn't tell but is there any muslim psychiatrist that can maybe explain this? Btw I live in Germany and in school they constantly talk about atheism and how religion is corrupted and a lot of people think that and it is so hard to argue with them constantly but if I don't argue I should leave it says in an hadith but how can I leave the classroom. Like I feel like I am doing so much wrong also cuz of some hadith. And I don't underestimate them. Also not shaking men's hand is so hard to do here but I used to be more strict with it but

now I almost don't even try not to shake their hands. I just feel uncomfortable doing it but I have no power to explain myself anymore. I feel like also I am reflecting too much like everv single action that I do everv little tinv thing I want to do but when I don't I am asking myself why and I push myself to do it but it's just because I dont want to feel guilty. I have a lot to tell but it's gonna be a book if I continue writing.

This is so chaotic. Love you guys. May Allah free all of the oppressed. Jazak الله kul Khair for your responses. I feel even better just typing this rn.

Salaam,

I just wanted to humbly put a dua request out there guys, I did my resit attempt exam today and it didnt go as well as I hoped I am in constant worry and upset over it, I have prayed tahajjud for it and consistently made duas for this career for the past 6 years of my life. Life has taken its toll and I am currently 2 years in this degree however I have been studying for this for the past 4 years due to resit attempts. This is my last chance ever and Allah has consistently given me hope and allowed me to pass my other resit attempt. Please pray that ny exam results allow me to pass through into the next year and that I am able to oursue this career I have worked extremely hard to maintain. Please do dua Allah makes this degree and career easy for me Inshallah

Thankyou and alhamdullilah for everything Allah has give me

Any advice would be great

Salam Alaikum everyone

I want to ask if you guys could make dua for a job interview I completed today for a hospital job really hoping I can get the job I’ve been looking for a job for years now and really want an income to support my mum and pay her back,

I’ve been looking and praying for a job for years but unfortunately have been in lots of competition and denied numerously

This job would be beneficial for so many reasons and I’m hoping Allah grants me this one please make Dua for me

A professor at my university intentionally failed me, which extended my standard 4-year degree into a 5th year. Even though it was devastating, I kept my faith, prayed, fasted, and made constant dua, believing that things would work out and I would finally graduate in my 5th year.

Instead, that same professor used their personal connections and administrative influence to block my course registration entirely this year. Because of this, my graduation has now been dragged into a 6th year.

I feel utterly shattered and exhausted. The hardest part right now is the spiritual crisis: I can't stop wondering why this is happening to me.

Was there something lacking in my worship, or does God only listen to powerful people who misuse their authority?

Why does someone's malice win while my prayers feel unanswered? My imaan and belief are slipping away, and I feel completely empty.

How do I deal with this administrative abuse practically, and how do I stop my faith from completely falling apart when everything feels so unfair?

Please keep me in your prayers. 🤍 I’m going through a difficult and uncertain time right now, and I could really use your duas.

I have a complicated relationship with Allah. I know He is the best of planners but this time I really want my plan to work. And He can make it good for me even if it isn’t right. He’s Allah He can do that, right?

Assalamualaikum. My first time posting here. I had an abortion recently where i lost my little girl. I don’t know how to deal with this. I knew for a fact she was going to be following deen better than me because since i had gotten pregnant with her all i wanted to do was pray and read quran. I know she’s in jannah right now. Maybe i didn’t deserve her that’s why allah took her away from me. I regret the life i used to live- angry and irritated with people around me who cared about me. I feel like this is my punishment, having to lose my baby. I want to become better. I want to become a patient person not easily irritated and not snapping at people like before. I want to correct my mistakes. Whenever i die i want to be in jannah with my daughter. I want to become better. Please help me. How can i control my anger and emotions and become a better person?

Assalamwalikum, I don’t know if this is TMI but i’ve been having really bad health issues recently— not terrible but bladder issues for a while. Please does anyone have any advice on what dua to make to help this, maybe something for health?

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Assalamualaikum dear brothers and sisters...I am a woman who finished mbbs final exams last month and results are going to be out next week.I have a really special situation where I come from a family where no one ever had any patience to pursue studies.Everyone gets married early.My father and mother sacrificed a lot and against all superstitions helped me throughout my study.Allah has always helped me with everything Alhamdulillah. I got into govt medical entrance exam.Passed other exams.This time too I gave exam with full tawakkul as you know there are too many segments and a lots of students fail just for very little numbers.I messed up in some segments.Gave most of the exams properly Alhamdulillah.I am not really scared for me or my career...I am more scared for my parents who sacrificed a lot.And a lot of people are going to give them that look you know like what was the point of all these sacrifices.You daughter still failed.People don't know failure is a common thing in medicals...Please brothers and sisters..Keep me in your prayers if you pray or pray tahajjud...I am more scared for what would my parents feel...Please make dua for me and my friends so we become doctor InShaaAllah on this first attempt...And give me any advice regarding making duas if you have....Thank you so much If you read all these...May Allah bless you all with abundance,happiness, success in this duniyah and hereafter...Ameen...

Please make dua for me that in my IGCSE results I get 5A* with all top in world awards in all 5 subjects with grade one in English speaking آمين يا رب العالمين

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As Salaam Alaikum. I hope you are all doing well.

I had a serious question on what are we supposed to do as Muslims if we have tried many options. I have tried many things to get better.

Alhamdulllilah, been praying Dhikr, tahujjid, ruqyah and also tried medical route.

I feel stuck as I don't know what do do next.

Islamically what advice or what do I supposed to do next?

Jazak Allah Khair

Assalamu alaikum, brothers and sisters.

I really need your help. Please, please make dua for me that I am able to complete and pass my thesis. I found out today that my thesis was not approved, and I am now on my final deadline, which is September 7.

I really need to pass my thesis because I need my degree to be able to move forward and find a job. Lately, I have been feeling very depressed and sad because things have not been going the way I hoped they would in life, especially when it comes to my studies, career, and future.

I am making dua myself, but I would sincerely appreciate it if you could also make dua for me, that Allah makes this easy for me, gives me strength, patience and guidance, and allows my thesis to be accepted and approved.

Please keep me in your duas. May Allah reward you all, bless you and your families, and make things easy for everyone going through difficult times.

Ameen. 🤲🏼

Me and my friend have recently completed our igcse (End of school exam) and we will be receiving our results tomorrow inshallah. We are extremely anxious and scared. Hopefully to whoever sees this post can pray for us to get good results to ease from this anxiety. We really hope to make our parents proud for the efforts they have put into us. To whoever who prays for us may Allah bless you with peace and prosperity AMEEN.

: hi everyone so my result is coming tomorrow and i planned on praying the whole night but i have sadly gotten my period. This result is really important and i am really scared its my igcse result so are there any alternatives any other duas i can recitee or any other prayer rituals i can preform while being on my period . Thank you!!!!

Sometimes, and lately more often, I genuinely don't understand how everything can remain this quiet when I've been praying for help for so long.

Since 2018, I've been making dua, praying tahajjud, giving sadaqah when I can, fasting, trying to be patient, and holding onto tawakkul. My family and I have struggled financially for years, and for almost eight years I've been praying for guidance, help, a sign, or simply some light.

But these eight years have also meant being incredibly isolated. I have no friends, barely see anyone, rarely leave the house, and I have struggled deeply with anxiety and depression.

And when I say that I'm in a much worse situation now than I was in 2018, I mean financially too. I am in a very serious financial situation now, and almost no one knows about it. I know that some of this is because of mistakes I've made myself. I'm not denying that. But what I genuinely don't understand is how, after trying so hard to be patient and steadfast for so many years, I could somehow end up in an even more difficult place than where I started.

I know that some of you will tell me; "You need to tell your family." I understand why they say that, but it isn't that simple. If you knew my family and my history, you would understand why I can't just tell them everything. I don't think I ever will.

The only one I have shared all of this with is Allah.

For so long, I was certain that He would help me. And honestly, I wasn't even thinking about the things I was praying for back in 2018 anymore. I was simply asking Allah to help me with a debt that I need to repay to someone, and now I have one week left.

A year ago, I thought, "Allah will help by then."

Then six months.

Then two months.

Now there is exactly one week until a very serious deadline, and I am still telling myself, "There is still a week. Allah will help."

But I am exhausted.

My hands are shaking, my health makes everything harder, and lately I have been struggling with some very dark thoughts. I feel frightened by how overwhelmed I have become.

What hurts me most is thinking about my family. I think about my mother and my siblings and what they would have to go through if something happened to me, and it breaks my heart. I don't want to leave them with more pain and problems.

I am just so tired.

My mind won't stop. The same thoughts keep going around and around, and my whole body feels like it is carrying the weight of everything.

And despite all of this, I still have tawakkul.

I still believe in Allah.

I still tell myself, "I have a week. Allah can open a door in a week."

But I am also scared, hurt, angry, confused, and completely exhausted.

I just don't understand how, after holding on for eight years, I ended up here.

The time is ticking, and I'm struggling to understand why everything still feels so quiet.

If you read this, please make dua for me. Please ask Allah to fix all my affairs, relieve me from this debt and distress, and open a door for me where I cannot see one right now.

Please ask Allah to give me strength, protect my family, and bring relief from a situation that currently feels impossible.

I am not asking for money. I am asking for you to take time to make a genuine Dua for me. I have heard that a strangers dua is very strong, so if you could gift me one of your Duas I would be very thankful. I want to start to live again, I have been surviving the last 8 years.

May Allah grant you and me ease. Ya Allah grant me ease by the this week is over (it is already monday over here), Ya Allah grant me a miracle. Ya Allah if who ever is reading this and going through something - please grant them ease and a way out aswell. Ameen.