Let me preface this by saying I hate swimming, I get so bored in a pool and wonder why I’m there. To top it off being in a wet swimsuit is such a sensory nightmare for me, it just isn’t my thing.

I was talking to a friend today about an upcoming pool party another friend of ours is hosting. I mentioned despite skipping all the other pool days that I’d be going to this party and I’d even ordered a swimsuit so I wouldn’t feel out of place.

I said I probably wouldn’t swim and would just hang by the pool, but I was looking forward to it anyway, and she started off by giving me some “advice” that everyone, “not just fat people” has insecurities about being in a swimsuit. I have zero qualms with being in anything skimpy or revealing, or with anyone seeing my body by the pool. I wear things that expose my midriff and legs regularly, Im never trying to hide my body, so this advice felt out of left field.

It was so annoying and out of nowhere and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head. Even people who are close friends with us, who are around us often still have these misconceptions. This comes not long after another thin friend asked me how offended I was by Norbit’s use of fat suits (why are we bringing up a 20 year old movie?) as a fat person. Like be for real.

Anyway, love you all.

Hi All,

Going on a date tomorrow with a guy whose been heavily flirting /borderline sexting me on app. I have a full body photo as my primary photo, but still so paranoid, I'm going to get there and he will instantly no longer be interested, because im bigger than he was anticipating. Im a UK size 22/24. Just wondering how others find dating as plus size. Part of me kinda wants to remind him like "hey you know im plus sized" before the date, but worried it'll come off very insecure.

I'm a first generation American of South Asian (Indian) descent. I've always been fat my whole life and struggle with PCOS. As a kid I was bullied relentlessly either for my weight or because of my ethnicity. I don't feel like I belong in the Indian community either because people in my experience are very judgemental and fatphobic.

I don't have any friends or sense of community but I haven't sought out people. I just always assume people are not going to like me at all so it's like why even bother. I don't even like meeting new people unless I have to for work. I also avoid even hanging out with my family because they are so critical and my weight always gets brought up. I do want to socialize and not be so isolated but I don't know how I can when most people will never like or appreciate me?

I'm heading to Vancouver later this month and wondering if there are any particularly good shops for a plus size (2x-3x) girlie who doesn't want to dress like a depressed 60-year-old elementary school teacher or a Disney Adult? I've got Penningtons, Ricki's, Blue Sky, and Reitmans at home so I'm hoping there are more options in the bigger city.

I'm a lifelong Floridan and I've only ever seen snow once. Next January, I will be taking a trip to visit friends in Toronto, which does the cold. I would like to be not cold as I am not prepared for it as a person. Where can I get a good coat? I wear a 24/26 and I'm not looking to break the bank because this will just sit in the back of my closet for several years probably. I'd be open to thrifting too!

I 20f have never dated or had my first kiss or anything like that. And I want to start dating. You know, before I got the confidence I do now, I was deathly afraid of guys. A lot of guys at my school suck but honestly a lot can also be pretty cool. But that's the thing. I don't know many because I still don't interact with guys a lot. In my major it's like mostly girls even though everywhere else it's "guy" "guy" "guy". At least for the majority of my classes.

Then if they are it's a guy I know wayyy too well and I don't wanna mess up our relationships. Plus they're the ONLY guy and I feel weird. Or they're freshmen or older guys. Nothing wrong with that but that's just my preference.

I honestly still am a little scared of being around guys. I know why, because there's a certain hurt that can come from the gender you find attractive to dismiss you. But right now? I don't give a fuck because there are PLENTY of girls who don't like me either. And I'm not scared of them.

So I'm getting rid of this asap.

I think I might just be more confident with the guys I do interact with. Treat them like I do with girls. Maybe join a club idk. I mean I really am just around other girls so I feel like a creep but at the same time what else am I going to do?! 😭

I need to find some school events or something!

Need advice please if you can offer anything!

Anyways this was fun, luv ya!

Bras bras bras

HELP!

My back feels like I am 100 years old

I have tried so many options I am exhausted of trying and returning a million times. I’m tired of spending so much money to be in pain. Please help me. I will take any and all recommendations. I would do ANYTHING to be able to try on in store. The current Lane Bryant bras I have are KILLING me and putting permanent indents in my shoulders. I went to two locations and returned three different sizes before being assured these were the right size. I really need advice I’m overstimulated and overwhelmed.

I’m currently wearing a 42D at Lane which seems insanely small to me but the other sizes were too big.

I don’t want an underwire due to sensitivity issues/comfort.

Thank you in advance I’m mid meltdown

Something always happens to me when I try to buy plus size clothes:

my hip and bust tend to match the size of the garment I'm looking at online but my waist is always way larger than the listed waist size for the garment. so like, for example, if a 2xl in a given store is 46/39/48 but my measurements are 45/44/48. not my actual measurements but just using this as an example. sometimes, the waist discrepancy is so huge that I'm like..... has this store never met a chubby girl?????? we tend to have bellies...... do they not realize this???

when it comes to pieces that tend to rely on just one or two of these measurements (like pants or shirts for example) this is not that big of a deal, I can sort of work around it as annoying as it is. But when it comes to larger pieces like a coat or a dress that's when I'm like..... how am I expected to fit into this exactly? I imagine I'm not saying anything you don't already know but like... these sizes don't seem feasible for anyone over a 2XL that doesn't have an hour glass shape. I have a bit of a belly (which I don't mind), that's why my waist size is so much bigger than the garment. I suppose if I sucked in my belly I could MAYBE fit into the belly but I would rather not have to do that 24/7.

I'm probably preaching to the choir here but like I say all of this to ask for advice: Have you been in this situation? how do you navigate it? I'm genuinely at a loss for what I'm supposed to do other than, not wear coats or dresses. And if you have any brands (bonus points if goth, but not required) that are more conscious of this I would love to know, cause so far it feels like every brand does this.

I don't really shop for clothes that often because it kind of sucks for me (hence why it probably sounds like I don't know that much about clothing sizes) but I'm trying to change that and genuinely find stuff that I'd like and that would fit.

I’m going to go to the Philippines at the end of this month with my family to do thrill seeking activities like canyoneering and ziplining. But the thing is i’m 125kg (275lbs I think) and this is my first time doing activities like this and i’m a bit worried about my weight. I’m also scared of heights but I want to face my fears and unleash my adventurous side.

Has any one of you tried doing thrill seeking activities like ziplining, bungee jumping etc. as a plus size person? What’s your experience? Did your weight affect it?