have always been fascinated by androgyny and how thinly-separated masculinity and femininity can be… so decided to do a side-by-side comparison in an everyday outfit!

• masculine: shirt un-tucked and joggers waistband sitting on (or below) hips; chest puffed, shoulders raised, and spine straightened to emphasize upper body mass.
• feminine: shirt tucked and joggers waistband sitting higher on torso, minimizing waist and highlighting curves; shoulders angled toward camera lens and hip popped to emphasize lower body.

be yourself, everyone else is taken! ❤️‍🔥

It’s spooky season

Not sure exactly how to explain this issue, it always sounds kinda stupid when I write it out, but basically I feel like I am missing a lot of potential matches because my gender presentation is ambiguous which makes it a little confusing what kind of dating/sexual partner I'd be or want.

Basically in my photos I mostly pass as a woman. People who just look at the photos assume woman. So I end up having to put some kind of awkward disclaimer in my profile. But then this becomes difficult to do without making my profile look excessively horny, because the information I need to communicate is about what genitals I have and how I intend to use them. Even just including the word "top" totally changes the tone of a dating profile, it brings things directly to sex and hookups and honestly less desirable matchups. I'm also never quite sure how to list my gender, I tend to list trans woman or list both man and woman when that's allowed. Sometimes there's an NB category but putting yourself there is a graveyard for matches.

I'm just trying to find a way to communicate "this person looks and talks like lady and the tits are natural, but is male and is into you and everything's fully functional and there's no weird sissy stuff involved here." This turns out to be surprisingly difficult to get across without writing about my dick on my bio, and I really want to come across as normal and not repel nice people or attract ghosty one night stands. But I also want to find the NBs and straight/bi women who are into whatever I categorize as.

Any ideas gang?

Hey! I’m a nonbinary/genderfluid woman. I would say my personal style is comfortable, girly, and cute-sy. When I see other queer people online they almost always look “alt”. If you took a look at me, you probably wouldn’t assume I’m queer (but then again you can never assume). I wear plain t shirts, plain jeans/shorts, sneakers, and occasionally necklaces. I don’t even wear makeup. So when I compare myself to other queer people, I just feel less than; like I don’t fit in. They make sure they stand out in a crowd, but I pretty much blend right in. I just feel like I’m too “boring” for such a creative group. Idk, I just wanted to get that out.

This sub has done so much to get me there. Thank you all.

Edit: this post is exactly what I’m talking about. You are all amazing with the love and comments. I was telling an NB friend that I think this sub is the most supporting and confirming place I’ve ever been.

Especially if it’s not easy to tell what sex/gender the kid is. There was another thread under this post about the clothes and hair of the kid, how it’s a „boy‘s haircut“ or „girl‘s shoes“ so this is the right pronouns to use for them.

Like, theres no gender to clothes and haircuts for one. And if we can‘t tell right off the bat, why not just choose whatever‘s in between? I don’t think it’s that difficult.

Original commenter used „they“ for the presumable parent in the video and I see nobody complaining about that too. But it’s suddenly a problem when it comes to the kid/s.

I only recently came out as agender. Big reason was how stupid gender norms are. Im AFAB which I found nothing wrong with being but I just hated how Im treated because of it. Im always told to not cut my hair, shave your legs, dont lift that let a man do it. It always pisses me off. I do want the world to know that you really shouldnt judge gender and to only judge the person themself, but my problem here is I still want to prove that women are badasses too and they can do stuff men do. So at work, everyone knows me as a woman so I feel that revealing im agender wouldn't prove anything. I kinda just want to be a role model for other women who are working at blue collar jobs and to show people that "yeah, women can do this too."

Edit: I should also mention my co-workers very much respect me and have seen just how capable I am. Its the customers that tend to view me strangely

I’m 29NB and am looking for advice/encouragement/suggestions on how to
make the wait for top surgery easier. I have a consultation with a therapist in about 5 weeks (a gender therapist who will approve me for a surgical consultation through my insurance). The wait has been excruciatingly painful and difficult. I’m constantly aware of my chest and how it feels, giving me anxiety and a sense of impending doom. I’m taking a lot more of my anti-anxiety meds but I can’t numb myself into oblivion for the next several months which I wait for the therapy consult and then however long for the surgical consult and however long til surgery. What do you do while waiting?

TLDR: top surgery feels impossibly far away, how do I cope?

he/him (now) -> he/they (1.5 years ago) -> they/he (2 years ago) -> they/she (2.5 years ago) -> she/they (3 years ago) -> she/her (3.5 years ago)

very condensed transition timeline in pictures 😎 I used to ID more as transmasc (though I’ve always enjoyed makeup, long hair, and more feminine fashion) but I think going on testosterone made me feel more free to present more fem and it made me realize my gender is a lot more androgynous than I thought. I’m more or less just perceived as a woman now, but that doesn’t really bother me. I know who I am :)
anyway, people always have questions when I talk about my experience with gender and HRT so I figured I’d make a post specifically to answer them!

I use they/them exclusively, and his dad was referring to me multiple times as she/her. He stood up to him, told him that it was disrespectful and to use they/them. They’re still arguing about it right now actually, but I’m really proud of him.