I’m 21F from India. I graduated recently, got a job and I’m going to move out very soon.
The thing is, I’ve realised that I’m not very independent when it comes to basic life skills. I don’t mean financially. I mean basic everyday things that a person should know how to do for themselves.
Growing up, my parents never really let me do many things on my own. It wasn’t necessarily because they were trying to pamper me or treat me like a princess. They just usually did things themselves. Maybe because they thought I would mess it up, maybe because it would take longer if I did it, or maybe because they felt they would eventually have to fix it anyway.
So I never really got the chance to learn things properly.
I can wash dishes and I can hand wash clothes. That’s pretty much it. I don’t really know how to fold clothes properly, cook properly, clean a house properly, organise things, etc. There are a lot of things that I see other people my age doing without even thinking about it and I realise I have no idea how to do them.
Sometimes this genuinely makes me angry at myself and at my parents. I feel like if I had been doing these things since I was younger, I would have naturally learned them by now. But I also know that getting angry about it isn’t going to teach me anything.
I want to change this now.
I want to become the kind of person who can take care of herself without having to depend on someone else for every little thing. Not just the stereotypical "girl things", but actual life skills that anyone should know.
So I wanted to ask people here:
If you were teaching a 21-year-old from scratch how to become independent, what would you tell her to learn?
What are the basic things you think every adult should be able to do for themselves? Things related to cooking, cleaning, laundry, personal care, managing a home, dealing with emergencies, money, going places alone, basic repairs, paperwork, etc.
And if you were in my position, how would you actually go about learning all of this without feeling completely overwhelmed?
I’m not looking for someone to tell me that I’m too old or that I should already know these things. I know I’m behind in some areas. I just want to know what I should start learning first and what is actually important.
I have the opportunity to start over when I move out, so I want to use it properly.