My understanding was that it was a relationship where you can’t see each other due to distance and though to an adult my meagre hour drive isnt a lot but to a teenager living on a farm (so no buses) that is a huge distance.

I have no way to see him and will copy paste my other post in the comments if necessary. i was sure that people here would at least be somewhat understanding but i appear to be mistaken.

is there another term youd prefer I use for my relationship? If not please dont just comment “it’s not long distance” as that does not bene you nor I. I’m not an evil being or a moron, I’m a teenager looking for advice so please stop some of the rudeness

I'm F(22) and my bf is M(30). We've been dating for almost a year and we've been friends for 2 years, so all these 3 years we've only been texting. Ofc we see each other through pics, but we've never called or FaceTimed.

I'm an introvert myself and I don't really talk on the phone much in real life or FaceTime, and I never asked him to do that. But what makes me think about it now is that he never asked me either.

He only asked me once when we were friends if he could call me to tell me about something, and I told him I prefer texting for now. But since we've been dating, he never brought it up again.

Plus, he never showed me his full face. He always hides the part that shows his nose and mouth. I kinda feel guilty that I didn't bring it up before because he has seen my full face.

Our connection is rlly good tho. We talk every day about everything and we don't fight all the time.

Now that you know how my relationship is going, what do you think about it? And how could I improve it?

Hello, 23 F, me and my girlfriend are a wlw couple in a medium distance relationship (350 km). We try to meet everytime we get the chance, approximately 3 times a month for a few days and we love each others very much. I never doubt her love for me and her dedication to our relationship.
We ve been together for longer than a year and she just moved out from her family house to a new place in another town since she started working . She shares a house with roommates and she s starting to make new friends and hang out with them and deep inside of me there’s an unconscious fear that she will find better or that she will lose interest in being with me.
I know I shouldn’t since she is so much caring and never made me insecure but i don’t know how to overcome this irrational fear of being abandoned.
She is a strong,smart and capable woman and her life is finally becoming happy since she moved out from her toxic parents and im scared that once she finds her peace of mind and happiness, she won’t really need me or want me anymore…

Ok so me [19F] and my [18M] bf just moved in together after being long distance for over a year, we were laying on the couch and I was watching tik tok and something came up about travel nursing which is what I wanna do when i graduate college and he said him and his mom were talking about it because he just got back from his parents and he said that it would affect his career too because he was supposed to go with me and start school once i finished, we’ve talked about it before and he has been okay with that and I told him I didn’t care I was doing it it’s what I’ve always wanted to do, then he proceeded to say it’s gonna be a really hard career and he doesn’t think I can do it so i stormed off and say in the bathroom to cool off, when I came out he asked me why I was so mad and I said are you kidding me, you just told me you don’t want me to do the career I’ve been wanting to do my whole life, why am I even going to college if you don’t think I can do it, and a little yelling back and forth later I told him he was being selfish and he said he wasn’t trying to be and he’s sorry and I said well that’s not gonna cut it this time, it’s gonna take a lot more than an I’m sorry to fix this one and made him go sleep on the couch, am I the asshole?

Edit, I forgot to mention I don’t graduate for another 4 years and I was okay with doing long distance again but it’s him he doesn’t want to, it was his idea to go with me, I just understand why he brought it up if this isn’t even something we need to worry about anytime soon

Well——
Today was supposed to be our CTG date. Unfortunately through lovely circumstances inevitable in this life, we have not yet fulfilled that.
He’s still handling his business and not ready—he’s had a ton of transitions already and still an entire lifetime of his own to unload before he can accomplish another. 😔
I have decided to celebrate regardless. 💐 I’m buying myself flowers and dessert tonight. He and I would be doing this together if not for the hiccups.
1038 days of LDR—and still counting.
Prayers for all who are madly in love and still in this waiting.

I love my boyfriend to death, wrote him 2 notebooks full of letters on how much I love him, cause I really love him, and he's my everything..

So, I have a lot of insecurities in my body, I'm morena and I don't have fair skin. I can see my veins in my skin, I'm scared it's varicose and I have a lot more insecurities other than that ( I also have OCD). I'm scared that when he met me, he's gonna regret it cause what if he doesn't like me up close, like the texture of my skin and everything ( stuff that you can't see on face time)...

I love him dearly, and I'm so guilty that if he came here, he's gonna regret it and just would waste his money especially that he's from the US and I'm from the Philippines and flying one way cause thousands of dollars, and if ever he's regretting it, I do want to pay for his expenses, but I don't have a work yet, since im still a student. And I can't afford it obviously too.

I already feel guilty of him sending me a package that costs a lot already, and I can't compensate for it cause I have nothing in my name for now.

He's gonna come here this December or January, and I'm scared he's gonna regret it and just waste his money on something he'll regret seeing.

Should I break up with him so that he can save himself for the expense and for him to not regret it? If only I could pay for the flight that would be no problem, but he's gonna be the one spending for the whole trip here...

I really don't know what to think of, I'm just scared but I really love him, and totally do anything for him, as long as he accepts me.

been friends for five years. We stopped talking for a year but now she messaged me two months ago saying she's in my state on a work visa. She told me that she really likes me and wants to have a relationship so I said okay. I've been single for a bit so I said why not. She takes a lot of days off work and took off tonight to hang with her friends in the work program. She is 8 hours away and I told her if she can takes 3 or 4 days off I can pick her up and drop her back off as she leaves back to Puerto Rico on the 6th. She didn't answer my last text so now I'm not going to say anything but from what she told me she wants to be mine forever and she doesn't strike me as a liar.i doubt this job is very important and if she means what she says I didn't think it was such a bad thing to say. Any input?

Forgot to mention I just started a new job and still on my 90 days

Trying to watch a show on Netflix with my man but none of the apps log in automatically after this window :(( how do yall do it?

Ambos nos llevamos super bien. Nunca tuvimos problemas de toxicidad, celos, maldad, literalmente de ningún tipo, ni siquiera peleas... siempre todo fue amor, bondad, fue la relación más hermosa lejos... el problema es la distancia y es que aunque nos conozcamos no pasaríamos más de 15 días juntos... Y sinceramente no creo que sea posible planificar futuro juntos con casa propia y demás porque si de por sí un viaje cuesta mucho, aun más afirmarse en un lugar... y aunque no quiera tendría que conformarme con una persona que viva cerca.

Estoy sufriéndolo demasiado porque justamente me duele dejar ir una persona que tiene todo lo que quiero, que no quiero soltar y él tampoco a mí pero así se nos dan las cosas.

Qué podría hacer o cómo superarlo?

hi, i 18f just recently moved a state over to live with my partner 19nb of almost 3 years and their sister. we have a two bed apartment and will be splitting everything 3 ways. we’ve always held a lot of love for each other and our relationship is very good. except for the fact that i simply cannot stop getting triggered by little things and being defensive all the fucking time. i want to be the best version of myself but whenever i feel a way it’s like i can’t think before the words exit my mouth. and there are other things contributing to this anger i feel and part of it is missing my family, i left everything and everyone and when i get into it with my partner or their sister i sometimes feel isolated.

them and their sister are very close and sometimes there are disagreements and there both on each others side. it feels like i’m being lectured because they can communicate so well and i can’t. i’m not trying to say poor me i’m simply giving context. when i am angry its so difficult for me to get out of that cloud, and then those feelings are sitting and end up ruining the day. my partner is expressing to me they haven’t been happy in our relationship this past week because of the way that i get. which i cannot blame them for i know it’s a lot. i’ve been trying my best to not engage in the problem like walking away to avoid it. but my body language or the fact i was upset over the issue at all is still a factor for them.

we both come from not the best of homes and they wanted to get out of that environment which they did. that being said they have great relationships with their siblings and the way them and their sister handle conflict is so much more different than things got handled in my home. but i was told since coming out here it’s like i’ve disrupted that peace because of my tendency to get upset.

i’m not trying to excuse my actions but i am aware that the way i was spoken too by the adults in my life and how me and my family communicated has has a drastic affect on me and my relationships. there was a lot of arguing to get your point across and whenever there was an issue it would just go unaddressed until my family acted like nothing happened. i just want to be better because we genuinely love each other but it feels like i’m forever gonna live with this part of me.

we sat down and had a long conversation about how they won’t be like their parents and i was told to grow up. basically that i need to change or this won’t work. they told me we’re okay but if they have to they’d send me back home and reimburse me every penny bc of it. i’m scared that i’m going to lose someone who i hold very close to me.

i’m unsure where to put all of these feelings so i’m hoping i could please get some advice here.

(this isn’t about a man.)

basically i met this 24f girl from pakistan she was perfect. Her appearance her personailty such a awesome person however her parents sold her to a man when she was 15. i already knew this and since i was a virgin this really hurt my idea of purity

Today she revealed to me that the nephew that i always saw in the videocalls is actually a child she had with that man who is also officially her husband 5-6 years ago. so she lied about havjgn a child but he kind of forced her.

now im in absolute shock this girl was my absolute dream girl i really wanted to be with her. She wants to get an official divorce but thats almsot impossible in pakistan and she wants to know that im 100% serious about her.

she wants to flee to my country to be with me (after approving a visa) and the child will be left behind with the father (who has had kids from multiple women)

Im in absolute shock i loved this girl to death this news really devestated me.

I love her so much but my heart is aching like crazy what do i do i dont want to lose her but the situation is so extreme and sick

My bf and I have been together for 6 years, going to be 7 in February. We are finally talking about getting engaged and married so we can start the process of me moving to Canada with him. Never would of thought liking a boy on instagram when I was 15 would change everything. I'm so happy. I'm writing this as I'm waiting for my flight back to America (we were together for 6 months for summer) but I'm not as sad as I thought I'd be

Hello. I have always believed in love, and now I think I’ve fallen for a girl from another country—specifically, the country where I grew up and lived, though I haven't been there for three years and cannot return right now. We knew each other previously but stopped talking last January; however, we reconnected two months ago, and we have both fallen in love. I would like advice from people who have experienced long-distance relationships: How do you manage the relationship and break the routine? It is becoming increasingly difficult to find new topics to talk about, and I want to prevent doubt from creeping into the relationship.

We are already in ldr

And in the future she's gonna leave for abroad studies for 4 years

When she's around 23

I just don't get how I'll still be nice to her

Be happy for her

Like ask her about how her day was

Honestly I just deeply resent it

And im sad and salty she can leave me for 4 years...

I'm getting extremely consumed by this resentment

I tried communicating a little bit well there's nothing to say she's gonna leave no matter what

Like i just straight up asked what about me

And she said this

"Okay if I was in your position I’d be mad too"

I'm just so saddened by this reply...

She said this too

"Yeah you’re really hurting me rn tbh"

What i said was idc about you leaving now

i can't get myself to be okay for that

I'm really extremely saddened for now and I just can't stop thinking about this and I'm just afraid it's gonna ruin everything for us😓

If anyone can maybe explain how i could navigate this i would really appreciate it 🙏

For now it's just eating my brain and I feel so restless

I told her I'm never bringing the topic up again so I can't communicate with her

I finally made it official and broke up with her. She didn't notice I left her on read and didn't say anything the entire day. I'm tired of this so I just decided to officially break up with her.
~
Also sorry shout my other post and the comment I made. I was just getting really tired and tbh didn't expect people to actually DM me and all that. I'm sorry :<

But thank you for all of the support and concerns, all of you. Today I really needed to because it was actually draining me so it was either stay and continue this or end things and heal myself.

I'm doing a bit better now though, went to the mall with my dad for a little walk and got some Starbucks for a snack. I even got some new shoes! I know it's gonna take a bit for me to heal, mentally and emotionally, but I'm gonna get through it.

I'm also gonna focus on in-person relationships instead of LDR once I heal myself :3

Me (F29) and my boyfriend (M32) finally met in person after eight months of long distance (🇵🇭–🇪🇸).

On our fourth night together, he told me he was confused because he didn’t feel the same love for me in person as he did through the screen. He said, “But I’m willing to try.”

Hearing that made me incredibly sad and disappointed. I understand that this can happen in an LDR, because sometimes the connection you build online feels different when you finally meet in real life. I didn’t want to pressure him, so I started giving him some space during the following days.

I think he noticed the distance because he started trying to get closer to me, even pulling me toward him just to hug me. But strangely, those moments also made me question my own feelings.

Do I actually love him? Do I just like him? Was it love, or was it infatuation built from eight months of longing and imagining what being together would feel like?

I’ve experienced an LDR before, and it was very different. When I met my previous partner, I felt incredibly happy and at peace. My mind became quiet. I felt calm just being beside him.

With my current boyfriend, however, I noticed that I was actually excited to go home.

We have many similarities, but also differences that sometimes cause us to clash. During the two weeks we spent together, we fought around 2–3 times. Maybe that’s normal, but it still made me question our compatibility in real life.

The last day hurt the most. I imagined our final hours would be emotional, that we would talk, hold each other, and make plans to see each other again. Instead, two hours before I went to the airport, he was mostly on his phone.

Before leaving, I asked him, “Will we meet again soon?”

He simply said, “Maybe.” 🤷

That answer has stayed in my mind ever since.

Now, one or two weeks after meeting, I still don’t know what to do. I’m even thinking about canceling my visa application to Spain, because I was planning to visit him there, and now I don’t know if there will even be a relationship to visit for.

Part of me thinks we should give it more time. Maybe two weeks isn’t enough to understand each other after eight months apart. Maybe feelings can grow once the initial awkwardness disappears.

But another part of me wonders if I’m just holding onto something because we spent eight months waiting for this moment. Maybe he’s also confused and waiting for me to be the one to end things.

I don’t want to give up too quickly, but I also don’t want to stay just because of the time we’ve already invested.

If you were in my position, would you stay and give it more time, or would you take this as a sign to let go?

29(M), I've been dating a girl for several months now. We met online, it wasn't planned, but we formed a really deep and honest connection over time. She lives a couple states away from me and we've been talking about getting a place together where she is, we have yet to meet in person.

I know it would make more sense to meet in person a few times before making a leap towards living together, but that just isn't an option either of us can afford right now.
I have a job opportunity where she lives also that would pay fairly well, enough to afford a place and necessities, a stable life, only at the expense of a good portion of my time and energy. (however the job is through her family, haha)
This is another reason however that I'm considering the move, as an avenue towards a more stable life.

To be transparent, I deal with depression and existentialism that can make it pretty difficult for me to show up to life everyday in the way I'd like to.. I'm afraid this will bleed over and ultimately that I'll drag her down into a hole I feel I am already in. This isn't something we've shyed away from talking about, I've shared my fears and my worries, but she's been very supportive and encouraging about it when we have talked about it. Still, dealing with a person from a distance and living with them are two different realities. Honestly, I think I'm a mess. I'm a good person, but not nearly as successful or as stable as I'd like to be and I'm afraid to bring someone else into that mess, willing as they may be.

My bf follows thousand of people, thousands of people follow him back, many of them are girls. He says he doesn’t know them personally but they are from his school. Should i be worried about them?
He doesn’t like reels and posts on instagram, and he doesn’t repost also.
Few of these girls don’t follow him back also. He made his account in 2015.
Should i tolerate this?

Meeting my LDR boyfriend for the first time in a few months, and I’ve been doing pretty much everything I can to prepare especially physically.

We’ve been together for a year and 4 months, and although we’ve seen all of each other on camera countless times, I’m realizing that actually being physically together feels completely different.

I used to have acne, thankfully I’ve gotten past that, but I was left with some slightly deep acne scars. I also have a lot of freckle-looking spots across my body. I’ve been doing treatments, like lasers, skincare and basically all the things I can think of to feel better about my appearance before we meet.

I’m pretty sure we’ll eventually be intimate too, especially since I’ll be staying with him for almost two months, and honestly…that thought makes me really insecure.

He knows about my insecurities and tells me he doesn’t care about any of it. I believe him, but I still can’t get rid of the thought that he’ll actually see everything in person and notice things that he hasn’t noticed on camera. I know he loves me, but I keep thinking, what if he sees me differently once we're actually together?

I’m also a huge overthinker, so I can turn a tiny insecurity into a hundred different scenarios in my head. :(((((

I know these things probably sound insignificant, but when they’re things you’re already self-conscious about, the idea of someone you love seeing them up close, especially someone you’ve waited so long to meet is.just.terrifying.

Has anyone here experienced something similar before meeting their LDR partner for the first time?
How did you get past those insecurities once you were actually together?

And if you’re on the other side of this and there were things about their appearance that you didn’t find particularly attractive or wished were different/better, did it actually affect how you felt about them?

I’d really love to hear both sides. I think I need some perspective from people who have actually been through it. Thanks!!!

i am american and my girlfriend is english and i have been trying to find jobs i can do while in school where i can see her more often. i really dont wanna fly out there for anything less than 10-14 days but this is a steep ask for most jobs in america. i’m in college and we plan to get married after i graduate but until then do you have any advice? working full time and doing college hasnt been an issue for me but going a long time without seeing her has🫠 she works for her dad so she has more leniency with her time off, she has come to visit me but i hate her spending so much money to see me just for me to be at work or studying for 40+ hours. any advice for entry level industries that are giving this time off?

Im the bride from Florida! After 2 years almost 3,000 miles apart, I officially moved to canada! Super super easy country to migrate too! I hope all my ldr couples have this ending...stick with it, the rewards are so sweet!!

Me (M21) and my gf (F23) have been dating for 2 and a half years now. We used to call every day for hours. Playing games, watching videos together, etc.. It was CONSTANT. Although in the first year I wanted to have my own time as well and we got into a lot of arguments about that, I changed for her and started spending WAY more time with her.

Lately she's barely texting, when she does it takes 5-6 hours and it's short. Her excuse is she's "physically exhausted" and can't text like she used to. Me, not wanting to overreact, I acknowledged it and got busy myself. The emotion and the way she talks remained, the frequency is what changed.

When she visited in person 2 weeks ago I noticed she kept hiding her phone and closing it whenever I got close. Found out later it was Character AI. I told her early in our relationship I used to use it too (not anymore though) so I don't get why she'd hide it from me specifically. It weirded me out A LOT but I didn't confront her or anything.

Now she's basically swapped our calls for being on Character AI and listening to music most of the day. I'm very concerned because this started happening a month ago when she started skipping out every day of work because of her headaches, later I come to find out she's been texting with Character AI this whole time instead.

Not sure if I'm overreacting or if this is a real red flag. Anyone been through something similar?

This is my second ldr and he lives 9 hours away in another state we met on fetlife(iykyk) and ive now been up to visit him twice. Plans for him to move closer to me our kids are already besties and it feels so perfect this was the weekend when i went to visit(me 38 him 37)

So I(28M) met this girl(23F) online through reddit. Originally meeting as friends to chat and game and whatnot. We texted everyday for around 2 months straight, not missing a day. I didnt want to get my hopes up but I started to fall HARD for her. Shes perfect in so many simple ways, I cant get enough of her. The only issue is we live across the world from each other. I stamped those feelings and stayed close friends with her, watching movies on call and just yapping endlessly. Then one night, it all changes. She comes forward and confesses to me, ME! It was like i was in highschool all over again, I got so giddy and happy and emotional. After talking about it we realized we were both such idiots and liked each other for awhile and just didnt see it. We are either very dense or very stupid, either way i couldnt be happier at the outcome. We are determined to make this work, I want nothing more than to spend every moment with this girl. We are planning a trip together to finally spend time together and I cant wait any longer. I just needed to shout this to the ether as im so thrilled and excited to have found this amazing girl!