Hi all 👋
A few weeks ago my mother suddenly passed away. And she was my whole heart and best friend. I’ve been coping semi ok. But I came for some advice. I have a three year old and I guess I’m looking for some support on how to keep my cool with him. I notice my patience is thinner than normal (probably from being so emotional). I do not want to take this out on my little man, he’s keeping me going.

TIA 😀

My friend S (44F) father died over a decade ago and recently the funeral home contacted her to let her know his ashes were still unclaimed. He was an absolute monster who abused them terribly so she originally told them to just throw him away but they're saying legally they can't do that. The funeral home is several hours away and her baby sister has offered to go get him but my friend feels guilty and feels like it's not her sister's responsibility. I suggested she should go get his ashes and instead of just throwing them away maybe they could make a game out of it. Where is the worst possible place she could dump the ashes an abusive, junky, pedofile who hurt his own children? So far we have make him into soap and donate to the jail and next music festival sprinkle him in all the porta potties. Does anyone have any better ideas? Bonus point for creativity!

Hello, I moved out of my mom and step dads house at 18 because of a lot of needed emotional space and needed to just be free from the anger that my step dad, my moms boyfriend, put onto the family. My mom was the nicest, most caring woman ill have ever met. Although she let her family and boyfriend of 10 years take control of everything and there were times they would argue and scream for days straight but would ALWAYS be 'ok' again. Im the oldest, my brother about 5 years or so younger than me heard it all growing up. we heard it when it used to be physical and we heard it when it was just a screaming battle. I have 4 other siblings under the age of 9 and they heard the vocal stuff but were usually entertained by me or something else and didnt pay much attention to it. Stuff was sometimes good but he controlled my mom and made her out to be a crazy woman who was never good enough. Anyways. I finally moved out and my mom voiced to me she was sad. I feel guilty like i left my mom there with him and i should have never moved out. She was stuck there with 4 kids with him and nothing she paid for on her own. She had just got fired from work and started to drink alcohol again after not drinking for years. She did doordash as a way to make money and it just makes me so sad. I was the only person my mom was able to talk to without feeling judged because he pushed her own sisters away from her, her old friends, everyone. It was always all about my step dad. She would voice to me how she felt about him for years and i would try to help but I had just gotten sick of it for the past two years I was trying to start my own life and I just didnt want to hear about the arguments anymore. I told her i loved her and she just needs to focus on the good and if she wanted to leave id help her, but it wasnt enough. I left for a flordia vacation in the start of january and the second night of being there my 6 year old brother facetimed me around 10pm saying my mom shot herself in the head in the basement. I was in the middle of downtown orlando, across the country. I booked a trip back the next day and I just wish i never did. Why did this happen, i lost my dad when i was 15 already and im just filled with so much guilt, why couldnt I save them. Its now a couple months since then ive moved to a new place still in the same town. I broke up with my boyfriend of a year and I have one friend. Im so lonely and i just want to talk to my mother about dinner plans or how work was or just anything. Im sorry for grammitical errrors I just type pretty fast and dont think about it.

I’m 27 and my mum died on Sunday suddenly at 46. I am so utterly lost and have so much pressure to the point where I cannot grieve the way I want to.
My mum raised me and my siblings single-handedly she was always there for advice and help when I needed her and she always knew what to say during my big depression episodes and she is just gone. I want to just be alone to grieve but my family won’t let me and they are making me feel bad about that fact. I now have complete pressure on making sure the house stays in my dad’s name whilst he drinks his sorrows away. How can I grieve in these conditions

Apologies if this is not appropriate, I’m looking for specific opinions so that I can be considerate of the other party. Some details changed for privacy.

I got married recently, and before that had a few hair styling appointments at a salon owned by a husband/wife duo. They've been very kind and friendly with me. We were chatting during some appointments, and apparently I look and act exactly like their family member, and we were even born in the same year. I didn't realize this family member was no longer with them, until my last appointment.

During the wedding something happened that made me believe we received a blessing (think something like a butterfly landing nearby, and a save from a near fall).

Would it be appropriate for me to share this moment with my stylist, and ask to know their family members name? Or should I leave out asking for their name? Or just not mention anything? I don't know how or when or why this family member passed, and at this point don't have any more appointments to chat with them, so I don't know what's appropriate.

At my last appointment, they mentioned they'd love to see photos, so that's all I have to go on.

Edit: I guess my reason for wanting to reach out and share this moment with them, is that before I had known this person passed, I was looking forward to meeting and seeing how similar we were. I was sad to hear that that wasn’t possible anymore.

we met when through my cousin cuz she had a crush on him, that was in 2019, ever since then, we became close; watching each other go through our weird anime editing phase and many more.

he passed away the day before my bday which was a few days ago because of a motorcycle accident. my cousin messaged me that day but i didn’t open it because i was busy with bday preparations so i opened it the day after my bday.

maybe it was him who didn’t want me to open it yk?

the day of my bday i just went into this episode where i was running away and trying to climb a tree so i could jump off but one of my friends were there,however i kept yelling at him “let me go i need to die i don’t deserve to live!”

and after that episode i genuinely didn’t know what got into my or why i did that but after finding out abt my friends passing i kinda connected them.

i believe that we don’t have just 1 soulmate, but our souls are just connected to each other so i feel like my soul felt our connection just slowly disappear thats why i felt that way.

he only lived 30 mins away from me when we were living in the same country but never really had plans to meet up because we thought we had time.

he’s the first guy i’ve ever opened up to about my traumas, problems, boys but now i can’t even do that anymore.

he was only 19, he’s smart, cheerful, funny and everything, i don’t want to reach the time where ill be older than him cuz thats just wrong

as someone who has bad mental health and is suicidal, i always thought i don’t deserve to live because someone else have it worse than me and im feeling this way despite having a better life than most. i always thought if i died everyone would eventually move on because time just does that but it took me this loss to realise it doesn’t work that way. it just made me realise i should spend more time with everyone, get them what they want to an extent and just don’t lose that connection because you never know what life would do the next day. i don’t want this to sound like it’s all about me but, i’ve been really suicidal but now, i want to live for him, he’ll always be a part of me so he’ll be able to experience what life had to offer.

now i’m on a plane to our home country to see him for the first time but i’ve learned to just take chances, i should’ve seen him a long time ago.

i never told him a love him but i know he went knowing everyone loved him, he has so much life left and it just disappeared like that.

it’s crazy what grief can make you do; i’d say im a pretty logical person but then i found myself begging my cousin to ask his family if they could bury his phone with him just incase he replies back. i know with time ill feel better but guys how do i cope with this? i’ve been genuinely so desperate for something and idk what it is i just know in desperate; i literally asked the girl next to me in the plane if i could just talk to her and cry about him and she was so nice but yeah, grief makes me wanna hulk out kinda like i feel like i need to have another episode

when i found out about his passing, my cousin called me on facetime and showed me him in his coffin, and everytime i try to think about how this isn’t real, my mind flashes to him laying in his coffin, bruised and cold.

i’m sorry idk i’m just rambling but i hope u guys get what i mean, i still cant believe it. i genuinely still believe this is a bad lucid dream cuz my disassociation is so bad. there’s so much more i want to say but i just can’t put my head into words but please no judgement.

I have officially pushed my best and only friend away after my mom’s death. That’s all I have to say. I am so angry and sad about my mother being gone, that I just keep pushing everyone away. I am autistic and I have BPD, so I have always struggled with mental health. My mom died suddenly and it made everything worse. My mom was the ONE person I couldn’t push away. I split on my mom so many times, she was the only person who could deal with me. She loved me through and through and knew my mental breaks were not a personal attack on her as an individual. But she’s the only one who knows that. The only person who remained my friend, who loved me, who took care of me, who understood me, she’s gone. So because of that I just keep pushing everyone further away in order to not trigger my episodes (which are happening daily since she died). And so today my friend finally told me she wants space. I am sad. But relieved. Idk, guilty. Idk. I don’t have the capacity to maintain relationships anymore. I just don’t. I want to push my husband away too. I want to push away everyone who doesn’t understand what it’s like to be 21 and lose your mother when you and her both just started your lives.

I'm autistic and have a lot of mental illness as well unfortunately, This makes me an exceptionally troubled and lonely person with very few connections. My cat was my one and only true best friend and connection in my life..and now she is dead. It's only been 4 days so maybe it's too fresh but I am not taking it well. I want to sh, I want to pass away, I want to give up on everything completely. I have lost all motivations. I am mostly worried that there is no afterlife and everything my kitty ever was has been stolen away from me for good and I will never see her again. And if there is heaven and all that, I am pissed off that this God guy could hurt and kill a precious innocent sweet little baby like my cat. She died peacefully of old age. Sunny day. Plenty of snuggles. I should be grateful. But im not. Not to mention the millions of other atrocities God turns from. I'm furious. I have been having some really REALLY dark thoughts, some I dont feel confident to even share. I am not doing okay. I had to take time away from work because of all the sobbing and the inability to focus. I dont know how I will return to the "real world" now. I dont even want to get out of bed mostly. Everything sucks now. I was actually a really spiritual person before, huge hippie, i'm vegetarian but gave it up just the once to share chicken nuggets with my cat one last time cause theyre her favourite. Now I am like...why do I bother being a "good" person or whatever and trying so hard when it's all useless? Why make memories if theyre stolen away forever and mean nothing?

My grandma passed from small cell lung cancer on August 16. I’ve been grieving her for months but this is a different type of grief. I feel so empty. No more visiting or taking care of her. No more planning her celebration of life. It’s all over. What do I do now?

Sorry there are no pictures but I only lost her today and its so painful.

We took the heart breaking decision to have our beautiful cat, Lucie, put to sleep. She was 15 and was in our lives since she was less than a year old. She had an advanced and aggressive tumour. Even though she still had fight in her it was a battle we knew she would eventually lose and it was already affecting her quality of life - ability to eat properly and some cognitive functions.

She passed peacefully with my wife and I holding her.

That's when it hit me.

I've never felt grief like it, even when I've lost family members. A tsunami of anger, the guilt of "too soon?" or "could something else have been done?". Trying to understand how we could lose something so beautiful and innocent from an increasingly ugly world. I'm still crying as I type this, unable to sleep.

I don't know how to handle it. I'm numb. I can't find joy in the world.

I'm not even sure why I'm writing this. I suppose that putting at least some of it into words will help me make sense of what I'm feeling. I know this will pass, or at least become easier to deal with, and I know I have to take time with our other cat who is sensing something is wrong.

I'm sorry if this is rambling, but it's just my brain wanting to dump.

Thank you.

I’m 43 years old.
I’ve never had a night without my grandmother. It’s 11.30pm and I’m sad, she’s been there my entire life and from now on, I have to go on without her.
I have no grandparents left now.
Life is just… really hard.
Thank you to anyone who read this.

Miss him so much and life is different now not having him. I really hope he is In a better gentle place

Hi girl did you hear me when I was humming the tune of Taotao series? I just checked that it's actually quite old tv show it was made like 40 years ago so much older than us but not quite as old as mom. Maybe you know everything now, or you have easy access to all knowledge or something idk. I bet you even understand English! Yeah I know you knew a few words! You had VERY good memory. I can't believe that the disease that's supposed to make you a lot less intelligent didn't have that effect on you😂 badass. I'm not doing too good here. It's boring without you, and I still haven't met anyone who has your sense of humor. And confidence. Guess what I actually haven't read stories to anyone else. That was our thing and I think I wanna keep it that way. Now I can say some things so yeah I actually got quite attached to you when you were a baby. Sometimes I wanted you to be MY baby and not our mom's xD. I had no idea how powerful mind you would have. And although you became blind, you saw more than most people see. I'm so grateful to have known you, you literally taught me how powerful a woman, or a human in general, can be. Thank you for being you, showing that you can say no I don't like that or ewww or that's stupid or he's/she's stupid. There are so few women who are as unapologetic as you, and most of them learn that very late in life. Anyway THANK YOU BADASS BITCH ROCKSTAR!!!💝🧚🏻‍♀️

I lost my mum when I was 17 years old, and before then it was me, her and my older brother living together. After she passed away my grandparents immediately wanted her body brought to her birth country (in Africa), and being 17 and my brother being 21 at the time our protests fell on deaf ears. At the time I was emotionally paralyzed and to this day I barely remember flying to the funeral and the days afterwards, but almost four years later I’m coming to terms with how hard it is to not be able to visit her grave here.

I’ve never had a strong relationship with my grandparents, as they never came to visit my mum here in the UK, but to think in a decade and a half no one will be able to constantly maintain the upkeep of my mum’s gravesite drives me insane. I understand that my mum is also their firstborn daughter and they are grieving just as hard as me, but they also went against her wishes to be cremated when she passed.

I’m considering buying a headstone to at least have something that can bring me comfort, but I’m still heartbroken. If anyone has gone through anything similar or could share some kind words I’d greatly appreciate it.

I just turned 19 a few days ago and my mom's death anniversary is also near. I lost her when I was 11. When I can't do anything right I grieve the version of me that I could have been if I didn't lose her. She would've guided me and maybe she would have been my best friend. Grief never really leaves for me it just manifests and integrates itself in our lives forever. Every small thing reminds me of her, when I trip I remember how clumsy she was, when I sing I remember her dancing to my young self singing. I find it so unfair that she was taken from me. She wasn't bad, she was a doctor and yet she died in the place she dedicated her life to. I'll never be okay, I think a part of me died with her that day and it will never fill up.

my birthday lands the day before my mom’s and this year is my second birthday without her so obviously i’m not a fan of my birthday. this year especially since we had planned to go to new orleans but ofc we can’t do that anymore and i decided i just don’t want to celebrate this year and i told my sister this and she got very upset with me making me feel selfish? i don’t understand what im doing wrong here i had 19 birthdays i spent with my mom we made it into a joint celebration so yeah im not gonna want to do anything. i dont know why im the bad guy here for hating my birthday right now but whatever i guess.

Tomorrow will be my mom’s 1 year anniversary. It’s hard to believe all this time has passed. Last year on this day, I was convincing my mom to go to the hospital and that was our last conversation together. I miss everything about her & my mind can’t comprehend that I’ll be spending the rest of my life without her. There’s just so many things she she’ll be missing and I hate that she won’t ever get to experiencing them. Just some thing I wanted to get off my chest

My partner just lost his dad to cancer, he was fighting for a long time and spent his last 4 days in the hospital. Now my partner is not only dealing with this loss but is also losing his housing and is dealing with dozens of estranged relatives that certainly don’t have his or his late father’s best interest in mind (they were in his house riffling through his things before he was dead etc) I am lucky enough to have never experienced tragedy like this and don’t know how to best support him. It feels like there is so much on his plate and I don’t even know where to begin helping. He is also the type that doesn’t ask for help and I don’t know what to offer.

Im 13m she was 13f as well her name was myanna. We were friends since pre k. I have been into spirituality and she was too. She was really nice and always very selfless. We'd never be apart once. A few months ago back in march we were going to a local band concert because we were saving up for it. More of her because i made her. She didn't really want to go but i think she wanted to make me happy so she did. and when my mom was driving us there we got hit head on by a truck. Myanna wasn't wearing a seatbelt. When we got hit myanna flew straight into the windshield. I saw blood literally gushing out. My mom also died. I always blame myself. I lost 4 fingers. To cope i started sh. I decided to get a owigi board. I used it and tried to talk to her but she always answers in short words. I tell her how im sorry. I keep trying. No luck. Will update.

I’m 22 and lost my mom last year, and my sister is wanting to have a wedding and is starting to plan everything. I know I should be happy and excited for her, and I know it’s unfair to her, but I honestly can’t help but feel miserable whenever the wedding gets brought up.

I’m just so fucking angry and upset that my mom isn’t here and won’t be at the wedding. She won’t get to see my sister get married or be there for any of it, and I can’t stop thinking about that. I don’t even want to talk about the wedding because it just makes me think about her not being there.

I’m also really struggling with the fact that I’ll never see my mom again. Like, ever. The only thing that brings me some comfort is thinking that maybe when I die I’ll see her again, but even then I don’t know what happens after death.
I know my sister deserves to be happy and I don’t want to take that away from her. I just genuinely don’t know how to handle all of this.

The titles says it all really.

My dad was diagnosed with cancer back in Covid. He died last night after a month long stint in hospital with heart failure (a complication of his cancer).

I’ve been at the hospital most days for the past month and stayed with him for 10 hours yesterday. I read him a couple of chapters from the book he used to read us as kids and just stroked his head, held his hand, and told him how much I loved him. Eventually though I decided to leave because I knew he wouldn’t let go while I was in the room. He wouldn’t do that to his kids.

I’m just absolutely gutted for him. Nobody wanted to live more than he did. He also wanted to die at home but we couldn’t make it happen for him because he was too poorly to be moved. I just can’t bear the idea of him being sad or frightened in those final moments. He died with his wife at his side so he wasn’t alone, and she’s been the embodiment of a dutiful, loving wife throughout this whole time. I don’t know what I need to hear, I just need to share my sadness and anxieties I guess and know I’m not alone.

My boyfriend just lost his grandfather. He was in the living room when he received the call and watching him react triggered something in me. I lost my sister and my previous boyfriend in traumatic ways 2 and 3 years ago. I still struggle heavily with this grief. It still fully encompasses me at times. I felt terrible because I was crying because i felt this immense amount of pain for him but I felt like I was reliving being told myself. I felt selfish and stupid and I felt like it wasn’t fair. But I couldn’t control myself. I really want to be there for him but I’m really struggling doing so because I feel like I’m reliving my trauma all over again. He’s very understanding of my feelings and how this is impacting me. I just feel a strong amount of guilt and I don’t know how to navigate this.

so my (28f) mom (70) died in december 2025 and my dad (73) died in july 2026, about 7 months apart. mom was expected, dad was sudden. it’s been destabilizing to say the least. i’m doing okay, and have a lot of positives to focus on. i’m therapized, medicated, I have an incredible gf and support system, my job is good, stable, and understanding. waves of grief and magical thinking are still happening and will for a while.

I took a grief-moon for the two weeks after his death (I had coincidentally had a vacation scheduled and my gf and I started it early, highly recommend after losing someone), and then took a week of bereavement for the funeral arrangements. last week was my first week back at work, and i’ve been slowly resuming “normal” life as best I can.

last week we had some friends over to watch a movie. one of these friends had already been awkward about my dad being in the hospital (he had a stroke so she thought it was a good opportunity to pivot the topic to her 14 year old crusty white dog who had just had surgery lmfao), so I had low expectations to say the least. I’m not close with her so I don’t really care.

she unfortunately arrives first. she comes into the apartment. sits down and says nothing about my dad. then proceeds to rant for about 10 minutes about how her gf of 6ish months broke up with her. thankfully our other friend arrived pretty quickly after that and we were able to change the subject.

schadenfreude aside, the fuck? being put in a position of having to pretend that I give a fuck abt someone who can’t put on her big boy pants and say “i’m sorry for your loss” is so wildly inappropriate. my partner was pretty annoyed on my behalf. it took every fiber of my being to not say, “you’ll be okay, you won’t die.”

I don’t want people to have to experience losing a parent while they are in their 20s, let alone both. it sucks. the day my dad died, we got home from the hospital and I cried so hard i was scared. I just wish people could tap into empathy without comparing the death of a parent to a fucking medically fragile dog or a break up.

I've been a live in caretaker for my grandmother/grandfather while also working for the past 10 years, and my grandfather died last week.

I'm sad he's gone, but I'm also okay? I was always super close with both of them growing up, which is why I volunteered to take care of them. But ever since he's been gone, I've just been fine. I haven't cried. Haven't really thought of him too much besides the times we reminisced together as a family at the funeral and whatnot.

But I'm normally a VERY emotional person. I will cry watching movies, cartoons, playing video games, listening to music, etc on a near daily basis. So the fact that I haven't really had much of an emotional reaction to losing my grandfather, who I AM upset is gone, makes me feel like something is kind of wrong with me. Maybe I just handle death well. But why would I be fine with the death of loved ones but break down crying at children's cartoons??

I have autism. Maybe that has something to do with it? I don't know.

A friend of mine who's 21 female lives in sweden and she has an abusive family. She faced intense abuse since childhood and has failed multiple attempt(the last one was 3 weeks ago). She needs shelter and urgent help in any way which can help her with her suicidal thoughts and depression. She's not being able to attend her school because of her weak physical and mental health and she doesn't have anyone to take care of her. After her recent attempt, she wasn't allowed to live with her parents because they abuse her so She's temporarily living with her elder sister but She's really stressed because her sister also isnt going to take care of her for long and she's already only living on her own savings(the money she got as student loan). She needs urgent help please if someone could contact me it would be of great help.

I want to add a few more points.

She has seeked health from healthcare multiple times and pills or medicines dont work and she has also tried asking for help multiple times but they dont help with anything and she has no one to take care of her.

Please help we are very desperate she's suicidal every single day.

You can text me or post a comment here to seek more details if you can help in any way possible it wohld mean everything YOU COULD SAVE HER🙏