r/mildlyinfuriating • u/marcus_dobre_lover • 17h ago
I just wanted a hot dog Mom bought 150 lemons.
She randomly comes back with a butt load of food items once in a while
Any lemon recipe suggestions
\she’s 44, for people asking her age\.
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u/SonnyvonShark 17h ago
She fell into a math problem in a grade school curriculum, didn't she?
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u/ShiningGemstone1 17h ago edited 17h ago
i have 2763 lemons
i bought 1338 limes
how many pickup trucks to carry all my pineapples?
answer: purple because pancakes are on the roof
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u/MerMadeMeDoIt 16h ago
Susan had 150 lemons. She put an equal number of lemons into each storage drawer in her refrigerator. If she put 30 lemons in each drawer, how many days can she store them until her husband files for divorce?
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u/55Vikings 17h ago
Zest the lemons for limoncello. Juice them for lemonade
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u/portabuddy2 17h ago
Add the juice and honey to the maserated lemon alcohol and your have polish Cytrynówka is a popular Polish lemon liqueur made with vodka or high-proof spirit, fresh lemon zest, and honey.
I've made both. Italian and polish.
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u/carloscitystudios 16h ago
Makes perfect sense to my American mind, seeing as how Poland is a tropical lemon growing nation
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u/portabuddy2 16h ago
Citrus rarely made it to Poland before like 1800's and when they did it was mostly oranges. And only on Christmas. Any bacia or Gadgi will tell if someone cracks an orange it always reminds them of Christmas.
Lemons where even rarer so when they Arrived you would preserve them as best as you could. Poland is know for their rich honey. Strong spruce, birch and clover honey's are prized.
That mixed with grain alcohol and this strong honey. Then it makes sense. Trying to extend something that is so rare, came so little and passed so quickly.
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u/carloscitystudios 16h ago
Honestly learned something here about human behavior. Thanks a bunch
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u/Negative_Fruit_1800 15h ago
Believe it or not oranges were not the most common citrus in America when I was growing up in the 70s and 80s. It was a special treat to get them at Christmas. The church would hand out a bag filled with oranges, nuts and hard candy the Sunday before Christmas after nativity ceremonies.
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u/Troutalope1 13h ago
Boxes of oranges from FL and Vidalia onions from GA were also Xmas gifts from family when I was growing up in the Midwest.
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u/ElcidBarrett 13h ago
When I was growing up in the 90s and 00s, my parents always put an orange in my stocking. I never quite got it, but it was apparently quite the treat when they were growing up.
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u/Negative_Fruit_1800 13h ago
We could only get fruit in season back then so getting an orange at Christmas was like the holy grail.
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u/IHaveNoEgrets 16h ago
I mean, that's how they came up with this. Someone gave them lemons, and after a brief WTF moment, they just rolled with it and made booze.
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u/discordianofslack 16h ago
That sounds way better than limoncello
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u/portabuddy2 16h ago
It is. It's sour and sweet, it's thicker has an amazing mouth feel.
Because you generally make it with spyrus(95% grain alcohol) your not introducing any flavors other than the base and you proof it down to 35%.
Then you can drink it as an appertif or mix with soda and ice.
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u/Oregongirl1018 16h ago
And lemon bars and lemon poppyseed cake and lemon mousse and lemon meringue pie 🤤
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u/BiologyBooksBeats 17h ago edited 16h ago
This
ladyAndrew lemons^^→ More replies (5)45
u/SadisticJake 16h ago
Click on their profile. This lady is named Andrew
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u/Versipilies 17h ago
Stack slices in a jar stuffing the gaps with salt (for morrocan preserved lemons, great for adding to savory dishes) or sugar (for a cheong, fermented syrup)
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u/Full_Performer5159 17h ago
When Mom buys you lemons, make lemonade!
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u/Krell356 16h ago
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u/Bearstrum 16h ago
Finally! The engineers made the combustible lemons that burn your house down
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u/Galactinaut_001 16h ago
What? I thought it was supposed to burn Life's house down.
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u/hudvv__ 16h ago
Love this
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u/Crazyguy_123 12h ago
“When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”
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u/Dolphin_King21 16h ago
“All right, I've been thinking, when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade! Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager!
Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man whose gonna burn your house down - with the lemons!” - Cave Johnson.
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17h ago edited 16h ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Dont-be-lasagna12 17h ago
Saw a post earlier about how to make lemonade in 200 steps. Maybe that was OPs mom.
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u/RequiemQuilty 16h ago
Best lemonade recipe ive ever had
https://fuzzyblog.io/recipes/beverage/2022/04/08/jason-asano-lemonade.html
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u/notthatcousingreg 16h ago
Oooh cover lemon zest with sugar and boil it. Now i want this
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u/MMJtaPenguin 17h ago
Don’t make lemonade! Make Mom take the lemons back!
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u/VerseChorusWumbo 16h ago
Make Mom rue the day she gave marcus_dobre_lover Johnson lemons!
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u/archabaddon 16h ago edited 16h ago
Do you know who he is? He's the man who's going to burn your house down! With the lemons!
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u/Few_Enthusiasm5712 16h ago
DO YOU KNOW WHO SHE IS?! SHE'S THE WOMAN WHO'S GONNA BURN YOUR FRIDGE DOWN! WITH THE LEMON!
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u/iam_Mr_McGibblets 16h ago
Momma is the lemon Bubba Gump. You're going to have lemonade, lemon merengue, lemon curd, lemon bars, lemon pepper.... that's.. that's about it
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u/HiZenBergh 17h ago
When Mom buys me lemons. I do coke off it dude
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u/Familiar_Advantage35 16h ago
That could potentially burn really bad
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u/Bright_Ices 16h ago
Wanna lose your nose doing coke, but faster? Try Lemon lines today!
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u/beekermc 17h ago
You're sure she didnt steal those......right?!?!
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u/Takemy_load 17h ago
Our lemon tree is s our most valuable piece of property. Probably should get it insured
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u/beekermc 17h ago
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u/SingularityII 16h ago
First you get the lemons, then you get the power, then you get the wee-mon.
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u/bradlees 16h ago
Conan, what is best in life?
To crush your lemons, to see them driven from you and to hear the lemondation (sic) of the fruit
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u/Outlandishness_Sharp 16h ago
This Simpsons episode is a core childhood memory ☺️🙂↔️
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u/lostbutnotgone 16h ago
Has it been about ten seconds since we last looked at our lemon tree?
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u/Lickitlikeyoulikeit1 17h ago
You calling OP’s mom a whore?!
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u/kdawgster1 16h ago
There’s only one thing you can do to teach a lemon stealing whore a lesson
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u/PsyOpBunnyHop This flair gives you flair envy. 13h ago
"But I poop from there!"
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u/CelticMoss 16h ago
That’s such an obscure reference, thank you for the laugh 😂
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u/queuedUp 16h ago
Is it really that obscure??
I saw lemons and that was my first thought
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u/Superhereaux 8h ago
Yes, apparently.
A few weeks ago, someone posted a ring camera screenshot of a woman literally stealing lemons out of her front lawn.
I, being a reddit addict and connoisseur of grown up themed movies, obviously called her what she was and got downvoted.
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u/Avaylon 16h ago
This is the second time this week I've seen this obscure porno referenced. 🤣
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u/Incredible-Ironman 16h ago
And it's about stealing lemons?
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u/no-this-iz-patrick 16h ago
Always keep an eye out for the lemon stealing whores!
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u/meinhosen 17h ago
They fell off the back of the truck.
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u/portabuddy2 17h ago
I once got 20kg of shrimp frozen solid in blocks of ice like that.
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u/virginia_lupine 17h ago
Juice them, then freeze the juice into cubes with a silicone mold. Fresh lemon juice year round!
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u/Fantastic-Hippo2199 16h ago edited 7h ago
6 lemons, 5 cups water, 1.25 cups sugar.
Use vegetable peeler to peel zest off lemons. Put in bowl, mix with sugar, let sit overnight. Sugar will pull out lemon oils.
Heat water, mix with sugar / peel mix and strain out peels. Let cool.
Juice lemons and add to sugar water. Cool. Serve over ice.
Best lemonade of all time.
Edited boil water to heat water. I usually boil in kettle and let sit for a bit. Idea is that hot water dissolves more sugar faster. It also seems to not precipitate out or get grainy later.
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u/ion_driver 17h ago
But why
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u/QuickNature 10h ago
Im honestly surprised this comment is so low, and more people arent asking why as well. I really want to know what the reason is behind so many lemons
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u/TAforScranton 16h ago
- Juice and zest a bunch of them. Pour the juice and zest mixture into ice cube trays and freeze. Thaw a cube or two out whenever you need them for cooking and baking. Good for seafood, chicken, pasta, cakes, etc. You can also thaw the cubes in the microwave with a little water. Mix in sugar while it’s warm, then add cold water and ice. You now have perfect lemonade.
- slice them really thin and mix with raw honey. Store it in a jar in your fridge. It’s a fantastic thing to have around when you’re sick. You can also just eat the slices, peel and all, like candy. (Look up “yuja cha” but made with lemons. I’m not sure exactly what to call it, I’m sorry.)
- make candied lemon slices. Gift them to people who appreciate homemade gifts.
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u/Original-Metal-1921 16h ago
This is really making me want to buy lemons. The ice cube tray and honey ideas are brilliant.
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u/bodtabs 17h ago
is she an extreme couponer?
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u/PolicyWonka 16h ago
Pretty sure extreme couponing functionally doesn’t exist anymore. Lots of coupons are only 1 valid per transaction and not applicable with other deals, etc, etc. now.
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u/mishma2005 16h ago
Yup. I am glad for the limits on items, tho. Once Lucky’s had a deal on Dungeness crabs with no limit and some shoppers had filled their entire carts with them. I had to fight two ladies just to get two for my husband and I. I asked the cashier WTH and she said “greedy”.
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u/Prestigious-Fill-365 17h ago
I haven't used 150 lemons in my lifetime.
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u/todd311 17h ago
But, in my lifetime, I’ve bought 150 lemons & then threw them away because they got squishy or really hard in the fridge
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u/giraffeneckedcat 16h ago
Or all of a sudden, overnight, they turned into moldy balls.
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u/FutureFreaksMeowt Aqua Tofana save us from these fuckass men 16h ago
An, I see you also have adhd.
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u/GarageVast4128 17h ago
I have eaten 150 lemons like people eat oranges in my life.
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u/discordianofslack 16h ago
When I was a kid a lemon with a dash of sugar was the perfect summer thing. Even better if you freeze it.
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u/Blaaaarghhh 17h ago
I made lemon muffins the other day and damn, they're good!
https://sugarspunrun.com/lemon-muffins/
I used the zest and juice of 3 lemons to make 12 muffins... so you should be able to use all of those up if you make approximately 1 million muffins.
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u/G2k23 16h ago
Start a lemonade stand with a sign that says "no grapes".
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u/but-whyy-tho 16h ago
Step two: Expect many questions about whether or not you've "got any grapes?"
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u/ACcbe1986 16h ago
Lemon curd
Lemon marmalade
Lemon pepper
Lemon salt
Lemon sugar
Lemon loaf
Lemon bars
Lemon cake
Lemon garlic roasted chicken
Lemon herb salmon
Lemon salad dressings
Limoncello
Freeze Lemon juice in ice cube trays and store in container. You can easily make one glass of lemonade at a time or a whole pitcher.
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u/rivertpostie 17h ago
Dude. What's that Greek lemon soup? Avegolemono or something?
Edit: Damn. I was close: Avgolemono
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u/Brooklynpolarbear22 16h ago
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u/PolicyWonka 16h ago edited 5h ago
We had something similar happen at our house for a while. Some person was placing a Walmart order for 1 onion, 1 lime, etc.
Walmart said there was nothing they could do because the orders were legitimate and they had to deliver them. But it was insane — at one point we had like 3 separate Walmart drivers pulling up to drop off random vegetables at the same time.
It stopped after a couple weeks.
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u/EyerollComics 16h ago
Has to be mental health related.
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u/avrgwarthunderplayer 16h ago
yea most of the comments are jokes but this might actually be something important he should keep an eye on,
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u/Gloomy_Remove3298 16h ago
I had to scroll too far for this comment. Concerning that this is a thing with her tbh
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u/Any-Success-4887 14h ago
It reminds me of how my mom would randomly stock up on an item even though she had a lot at home. This was at the start of her dementia.
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u/TheVenerableEmrys 16h ago
I see where this is going, and I’m glad to see she got grapes too. Your mother is a smart woman.
You might want to buy glue to be safe.
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u/carpentersglue 14h ago
Oh man. My 3 year old son is OBSESSED with lemons. If he had the ability to stock a fridge, it would look exactly like this. I keep emergency lemons on me at all times. He would loose his shit if he saw this.
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u/Jesus__Skywalker 4h ago
on the weekends I take care of a quadriplegic guy. He has a brain injury and for the most part he's just normal. But he can get stuck on a topic and repeat alot. And he's got this weird quirk that when he thinks of something he may need to buy he'll buy crazy quantities. He had a pair of scissors go missing (I think they ended up being found) and he ordered 26 pairs of scissors (some were in packs). He goes through 15 enemas in a month. The other day he asked me how many he had left and I told him 45 (3 months worth). And he said "ohhh, I'm kinda low" and he proceded to order THREE YEARS WORTH of enemas.
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u/Jesus__Skywalker 4h ago
has nothing to do with anything, but if anyone wants another funny story with this guy. Here ya go.
One of his other quirks is that he watches movies all day every day (or shows that he has boxed sets of). He pulls all of his movies out in themes. Like he watched all of the marvel movies in timeline chronilogical order, he'll watch a whole series of a show, or sometimes he'll watch all the movies of one actor.
On the day for this story it was Wesley Snipes day. And I'm down for that. Sounds good to me, I can watch some blade, some new jack city, white men can't jump. Etc. But what you dont' factor in is that Wesley Snipes has been in a lot of HORRIBLE movies. And the movie we ended up watching is called FutureSport. And the premise of this dumpster fire is that sometime in the future, the most popular sport in the world is this conglomeration of skateboarding, roller derby and skeeball, they have a hoverboard and can pass this skeeball around and try to throw it in a little hole. It's like quittage but super dumb. And there is a war going on between two factions over the "territory of hawaii". And there is a proposal to have a futuresport match where the winner gets Hawaii. And yes, it is every bit as horrible as that sounds. It is either the worst, or second worst movie I've ever seen (congo, but for movie and personal reasons). But anyway we sat there watching this movie. And in the middle of it he had to leave to his room to cath. I could do it for him faster. But he prefers to do it bc it's therapy for his hands. This guy doesn't like you to stop his movies or touch his phone. So I'm just sitting there watching this pos while he's in the back. And finally the movie ends and my dude comes back in. He wheels over to the bluray player AND STARTS THE MOVIE COMPLETELY OVER. Worst movie i've ever seen and I had to watch it twice back to back. Literally credits....restart. That was painful.
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u/Mfingninja 17h ago
When life gives you lemons, make fun of your mom. Or something like that.
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u/Herteitr 16h ago edited 16h ago
Peel the lemons, about 6 for this recipe expand for 150 if needed. Take peels place in a bowl then add 1 1/4 cup sugar, allow to sit with a cpver up to overnight. Take sugar plus Oleo saccharum (acumulated liquids) add to 5 cups of water then bring to a boil. Allow to cool, remove the peels and discard. Pour into a pitcher then add the juice from the 6 peeled lemons. You now have the absolute most delicious lemonade you will ever have tasted.
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u/Chroniclyironic1986 16h ago
So this bitch is why walmart is always out of lemons when i’m trying to get the ingredients for shrimp scampi!
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u/skykovtchai 17h ago
Lemonade, lemon pie, lemon sauce, zoque (traditional lemon salad from Málaga. Uses a certain kind of lemon, might not be that one.), lemon syrup, tarta de santiago (traditional Spanish almond cake with lemon rind), lemon chicken, lemon pasta, lemon muffins, limoncello, lemon mousse, lemon sorbet, lemon tea with honey and ginger, ...
Also, lemon goes really good with Watermelon smoothies or ice-cream, with yellow rice (biryani, paella, etc), with roasted fish, with fried seafood (specially calamari), ...
Hope that helps!
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u/Sufficient_Prompt888 16h ago
Looks like it's time to get mum checked for dementia
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u/estebanrevenga 14h ago
....if dad used 23 lemons to make lemonade how many are left?
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u/Computers_and_cats 17h ago
You could make lemonade, key lemon pie, lemon meringue pie. That may be the most valuable property you have right now.
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u/theycallmethevault 16h ago
Key lemon pie isn’t really a thing, it’s just lemon pie. 😛
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u/Mattscrusader 16h ago
If only there were some sort of saying that might give guidance in this situation. Something about life giving you lemons
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u/Prestigious-Fill-365 17h ago edited 4h ago
Why is she refrigerating them?
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u/Working-Glass6136 17h ago
With that amount of lemons, it's probably better too. They will last longer in the fridge, even if they can be kept out at room temperature. At least it'll prevent them from drying out rock solid.
Source: Work in a restaurant, and have also had my mom bring home 100 lemons for no reason.
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u/VicePrincipalNero 16h ago
It is unfair of you to keep us guessing as to why anyone would buy 150 lemons. Do tell.
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u/potatoestastecool 14h ago
are you the person in my elementary school math homework who buys excessive amounts of fruits
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u/WinterSector8317 17h ago
Well, at least you won’t get scurvy